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Leeza Gibbons takes on new, difficult role
By Kat Carney
(CNN) -- For the past twenty years, Leeza Gibbons has achieved success as a journalist, television host, producer and businesswoman. But her most challenging role yet may be that of caregiver. She recently recounted the pain of watching her mother, Jean, slowly succumb to Alzheimer's. "In the beginning, we thought she had a problem with drinking," Gibbons told me. "The signs were so similar. She was getting disoriented. She was forgetting things. She was getting agitated." After a series of tests to rule out other possible ailments, Gibbons' mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. In March of 2000, Jean Gibbons appeared on her daughter's show, "Leeza." In a taped message, she told viewers, "If you have Alzheimer's, don't hide it. Go out and tell your friends. They will understand." Initially, Gibbons had reservations about her mother's appearance on the show. "I said, 'Mom, we don't have to share this with people.' And she said, 'Yes, we do. You must talk about it and continue to talk about it, until there is a cure.'" Currently, there is no cure for Alzheimer's. The disease destroys brain cells, resulting in memory loss, disorientation, personality changes and dementia. Gibbons' mother prepared her family for that time.
"She said, 'When I'm not there anymore, I don't want you to come see me. It won't be me, and I won't know that you are there. And I don't want to live with any of you. You must promise me that you won't let that happen.' It was the greatest gift that she could have given us, because our family had no question about her wishes." Jean Gibbons is now in the last stage of Alzheimer's. "She doesn't know me. She doesn't know anyone that she was so important to. It's her body, but my mom doesn't live within that body... She thinks I'm just a nice lady, and that's totally fine with me. That's my relationship with her now." Gibbons adds that she will continue speaking out about Alzheimer's. "I do this for one reason and one reason only: to honor my mother." In addition to carrying on her mother's legacy, Gibbons advises families who receive a diagnosis to begin coping with the practicalities right away. "I think the hardest leap for families is just to kind of stare it in the face and get started... People forget that there is a pragmatic side to this disease. There are legal affairs that need to be put in order. There are medical concerns that need to be handled; insurance that needs to be looked at. There are behavioral and emotional issues that you have to confront, and you will need support for that." In many areas, there are support groups for spouses and children of people with Alzheimer's. It's also possible to connect with support groups online.
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