Cannes' craziest film posters – A surprising omission from this year's Palm D'Or shortlist, 'Bikini Swamp Girl Massacre' tells the harrowing tale of a group of beautiful bikini-clad girls who go on a vacation in the swamp of the Florida Everglades, never to return (at least until Part 2).
'Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead' – In the movies, it's never a good idea to build something on the site of an ancient native Indian burial ground. So, let's face it, when the American Chicken Bunker builds a restaurant on one, they really have it coming. The previous tenants, fueled by a supernatural force, take "possession" of the food and those who eat it.
'Go Goa Gone' – Russian mafia? Check. A batch of new designer drugs? Check. Paradise remote island off the coast of Goa? Check. Err ... Zombies? CHECK. That's how to make a movie, kids.
'Return to Nuke 'Em High Volume 2' – High school students and, inevitably, lesbian lovers Lauren and Crissy battle it out with the hideous mutated Cretins while trying to save the world from the sinister CEO of the Tromorganic corporation, Mr. Herz-Kauf. All this while keeping on top of their homework. Marvelous.
'Sharknado' – What selection of b-movie film posters would be complete without the crossover hit, "Sharknado?" For those of you who somehow missed it, when a freak hurricane swamps Los Angeles, nature's deadliest killer rules sea, land, and air as thousands of sharks terrorize the waterlogged populace.
'Cockneys vs Zombies' – There's only one thing scarier than a bedraggled, demented, foaming-at-the-mouth Zombie, and that's a irritated Cockney. What happens when they meet on the tough streets of London? Well, wouldn't you like to know?
'Some Guy Who Kills People' – Top marks here for a title that isn't ashamed to cut to the chase. "Some Guy Who Kills People" is about Ken Boyd, a lonely man fresh out of the loony bin, who sets out to kill those he deems responsible for his miserable life.
'Vicky Donor' – A simple, honest tale of a man recruited by by an infertility doctor to supply him with sperm. A parable of the age, where said man heroically becomes the clinic's biggest sperm donor. You better believe.
'Bad Building' – Welcome to the Desmond. Sounds nice and friendly right? WRONG! Do not, dear reader, let the tower's pleasant name hide a history of horror that includes -- but is not limited to -- fatal fires, murders, madness, even colonial genocide. Abandoned for years, shunned even by squatters, the Desmond has sat empty for the better part of a century... until now.
'American Muscle' – Heard of a little film called "American Hustle?" Yeah, well, this is NOT that film, OK? It's an easy mistake to make. So anyway, John Falcon did 10 years of hard time in prison. Now he's got 24 hours to get revenge on every person who had a hand in sending him there.
'Pro Wrestlers vs Zombies' – Nobly taking the "X" vs Zombies tradition to heady new heights, famous wrestlers are pitted against hordes of undead when they unknowingly walk into a death trap.
'Abner, The Invisible Dog' – This is an absolute must see. It has everything.... So, it's Chad Sheppard's birthday and he's in for a big surprise! His best friend, Abner, a big furry Sheepdog can suddenly vanish into thin air and can talk too! But Chad already has enough problems fighting off two bullies who want to wreck his chances with the cute girl next door. With the parents out of the house, Chad and Abner have to fight off the bad guys, get the girl, and save the day!