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Caption ContestWinner

The AllPolitics Caption Contest: The Winners

We received 1,668 entries for our first 'Toon caption contest. We asked readers to imagine what President Bill Clinton should have said in that widely panned Aug. 17 speech about this relationship with Monica Lewinsky. The entries came from all over the U.S., and we even got one caption from a man in Pakistan: "Make love AND war!"

'Toonist Bill Mitchell and AllPolitics staffers sifted through your entries. Some were funny, some were serious and some were too ribald to post.

Many of you ignored the one-sentence rule, so we were liberal on that. But full speeches, no. In case of duplicate entries -- and there were lots of them -- the first one received got the nod.

Here are the winners of the trashy White House memorabilia, and thanks to everyone who participated.

-- Craig Staats/AllPolitics

First Place

"And if you believe me, I've got a bridge to the 21st century I'd like to sell ya."

-- N. R. Smith, Austin, Texas

Second Place

"Over the past seven months, we've created one million new jobs for comedians alone..."

-- Earl B. Whitehall II, Santa Rosa, Calif.

Third Place

"While my answers were legally accurate, they were all lies."

-- Travis N. Vaught, San Antonio, Texas

Honorable Mentions

"And furthermore, the janitorial staff assures me that all those stains can be successfully removed."

-- Bob Casazza, Wyckoff, N.J.

"I promise to you, my fellow citizens, that there will be no more sexual relations in the White House, and Hillary supports that pledge 100 percent."

-- Gil Steinke, Altamonte Springs, Fla.

"You knew I was a liar when you voted me in as president!"

-- John Langman, Mililani, Hawaii

"Read my lips, no new lapses."

-- Tim Klein, Broomfield, Colo.

"Not raid Khartoum! I said, 'Make Starr go boom.'"

-- C. Douglas Canoose, Vancouver, Wash.

"My wife is sorry you caught me."

-- A. Roger Abramson, Nashville, Tenn.

"I take full responsibility for my first speech. I misread people."

-- David Kovalchik, Mechanicsburg, Pa.

"The fault lies not in ourselves, but in our Starrs."

-- Betty Jolly, Charlottesville, Va.

"If it's oral, it's moral!"

-- Thomas Hall, Bloomer, Wisc.

"Pardon me."

-- Patricia Sierra, Toledo, Ohio

In Other News

Friday, August 28, 1998

Clinton Alludes To His Personal Problems
Sources: Currie Testified Lewinsky Directed Gift Return
Republicans Try To Build Support For Tax Cut
Transcript: Larry King Live Interview With Roger Clinton
Clinton Committed To U.S.-Russia Summit

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