When you try to communicate with someone who has Alzheimer's, you may feel like you've dropped through the rabbit hole into Alice's Wonderland. Because Alzheimer's disease slowly erodes communication skills, an affected person's words and behavior may make little or no sense to you.

Your loved one may have just as much trouble deciphering your words. The resulting misunderstandings can fray the tempers of everyone involved, making communication even more difficult. It's incredibly frustrating — for both of you.

Alzheimer's damage to pathways in the brain may make it more difficult to recall and to understand words. The frustration of having a precise word "on the tip of your tongue" becomes increasingly common for people with Alzheimer's.

Sometimes, one word is incorrectly substituted for another. Or your loved one may just invent an entirely new word to describe a familiar object. He or she may get stuck in a groove, like a skipping record, and repeat the same word or question over and over.

People with Alzheimer's may also:

• Lose their train of thought
• Struggle to organize words logically
• Need more time to understand what you're saying
• Curse or use offensive language

Make allowances. Try to remember that your loved one is not acting this way on purpose. Try not to take it personally. It's the disease talking, not your loved one.

Show interest. Maintain eye contact and stay near your loved one, so he or she will know you're listening and trying to understand.

Avoid distractions and noise. Communication is difficult, if not impossible, against a background of competing sights and sounds.

Keep things simple. Use short sentences and plain words. Avoid complicated questions or directions.

Don't interrupt. It may take several minutes for your loved one to respond. Avoid criticizing, hurrying, correcting and arguing.

Use "props" and visual cues to increase recognition. For example, take the person to where the toilet is visible, and point to it before asking if he or she needs to go to the bathroom.

Even if you get frustrated, try to keep your voice calm and relaxed. If your words and the way you say them don't match, it may be confusing. Your nonverbal cues often send a clearer message than what you actually say.