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Interview With Roseanne Barr

Aired November 14, 2006 - 21:00   ET


ROSEANNE BARR: I will not remain silent one second longer.

LARRY KING, CNN HOST (voice-over): Tonight, you know her. She's hilarious and outrageous. But now she's mad as hell too. She'll tell us what's got her on the warpath for the working class. And she'll answer your calls and e-mails; the always outspoken Roseanne Barr for the hour next on LARRY KING LIVE.


KING: A Jewish girl from Utah, Roseanne Barr is our special guest tonight, comedienne extraordinaire, talk show host. She has her own blogging website, She's star of the new HBO stand-up comedy special "Roseanne Barr, Blonde and Bitchin'," currently playing on HBO and available on DVD. There you see its cover. And her long-running series from ABC is still seen everywhere in re-runs and on DVD.

Why so much now in the political area?

BARR: Well, I always felt like I always was in the political area. It's just like, you know, I always was a political person, you know.

KING: Yes, but in your comedy routine...

BARR: I think my comedy routine was...

KING: ...didn't discuss Democrats and Republicans did it?

BARR: Well, no, but it talked about the position of women in society. I think that's pretty political. It talked about people like who, you know, were at the bottom of the socioeconomic heap. That's pretty political.

KING: Do you think, your latest blog says you do, do you think you have an impact?

BARR: I don't know if I have an impact. I just have a big mouth and I want to talk.

KING: And you're angry.

BARR: I don't know if it has any impact. I'm not angry. I mean I'm scared. I'm more scared than I am angry at like what seems to be -- I don't know where common sense went and I'm very concerned about that and I think that we need to get it back common sense.

KING: You are -- in politics you weren't optimistic about the outcome for the Democrats, predicted that the Republicans might retain the majority and then (INAUDIBLE).

BARR: I got really bummed out because I was like really praying. I just want to say that I was really praying for what did, in fact, happen but just before it happened I got like that feeling like, "Oh, it's not going to happen. It's too good to be true."

And I wrote that thing then because I write all day, you know my moods and whatever. And then the next day it happened just like I wanted it to happen. And I was like everyone went out and they voted for the candidate of my choice and I was so happy.

KING: You don't have many wins like that do you?

BARR: No, not a windfall win like that where it's like 100 percent that's great.

KING: But are you still -- are you still pessimistic though?

BARR: Well, I'm still scared, yes. I think...


BARR: Well I'm scared that it will be misinterpreted what it means so I just want to say what I think it means...

KING: Go ahead.

BARR: ...because it's always like the thing that's missing is the thing that talks about how all the stuff impacts the people at the bottom of our culture, of our society.

KING: What do you think it means?

BARR: Well, it is harshly impacting the people who are like Dan and Roseanne Connor in our society right now, harshly impacting them in every way and particularly for those who lived through Katrina and were resettled. They're American refugees. And I just want to talk about refugees in America. I do. I'm scared of that. I don't like it.

KING: Do you have hopes for Mr. Reid and Ms. Pelosi?

BARR: I don't know. The only hope I have, Larry, is that the American people hear me when I say "I'm so proud of them." I think they figured out how democracy works and just like I'm so proud of them for that. I mean they just went out and they made it happen.

KING: But don't you -- aren't you excited about having a woman as speaker of the House? BARR: I don't care if it's a woman or a man. I just care if they listen to the people of America. And I think the people of America have spoken and they need to be listened to, not just this one time but every single day.

KING: So that she's a woman is secondary to what...

BARR: I don't care what color they are or what sex they are or what nation they come from, such as Schwarzenegger coming from Austria, whatever, but you got to listen to the people because, you know what, these guys are public servants and I just want to remind that because everybody's forgotten that one. These guys are public servants.

KING: Yes, they work for us.

BARR: We don't work for them. We don't -- we're not their employee. They're our employee. And, you know, a lot of them that are rich guys they don't -- I don't know why they would go into being in the service industry when they're already rich enough. I just want to say I don't like the service and I don't think most of America does like that service either. And I'm going to give them a tip anyway.

KING: Are you talking about the waitress and the...

BARR: And the tip is get out of the business. Get out of the public service business unless you're really for the public.

KING: We have some e-mails. One is from Brent in Salt Lake City.

BARR: That's my hometown, Larry.

KING: Listen to this.


KING: "I went to high school with you...

BARR: Oh-oh.

KING: Salt Lake City and my sister was your counselor at girls camp.

BARR: Really?

KING: Would you consider attending our next high school reunion?" That's Brent in Salt Lake City.

BARR: I certainly would. I've been trying to get through to the people in Salt Lake City because I never graduated so I'm not on their stinking mailing list and I tried to get on that and get signed up for this. I would love to be invited to my reunion. I absolutely would. It would be great.

KING: Was it tough being Jewish in Utah? BARR: Are you kidding me?

KING: No, I'm asking a question.

BARR: Yes, it was very, very tough. It was tough. My whole family life was very tough. For instance, we were poor, Larry, but we didn't know we were poor because we were stupid too. We had a lot of problems.

KING: Last weekend's NBC's "Saturday Night Live" did a funny stand-up of Nancy Pelosi's so-called San Francisco brand of politics. Take a look.


UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Despite the efforts of this administration to frighten Americans about the Democratic Party and its alleged San Francisco values, last Tuesday you went to the polls in record numbers and you sent this White House a message. Who's your friend?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Oh, this is my slave. His name is Phil. He's a human ashtray.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: (INAUDIBLE) this office is non-smoking.




KING: Funny stuff.

BARR: That's funny.

KING: On your blog you write, "Bush is going to declare war on China next, I swear."

BARR: I was so scared because I woke up and there was the Drudge, you know. I always read the Drudge Report and it said on there that the Chinese were like, you know, spying on our subs or doing something with our subs and I was like, "Oh no, he's going to think that's an act of war and then we're going to go over there next." I mean we're everywhere. We're everywhere.

KING: The Internet as a political medium viable?

BARR: Yes, it's like the only one left, absolutely, and that's not just me saying it. That's everybody saying it.

KING: But there's 80 billion things on it.

BARR: Yes, but if you know where to look, you know, it all can come together. When you're looking for the particular information that you're looking for after you do the big search, this is what I found out by going on there, it just takes your mind and then you live in there forever. You can never come out.

KING: I've never done it, never gone searching.

BARR: Oh, my God! It just opens up the whole universe. It's so awesome. You would love it.

KING: No, I wouldn't.

BARR: Anything you want to know.

BARR: The wife loves it. I wouldn't love it. What do you punch little buttons and things?

KING: You just click on this thing. The thing is you got to be able to read, so you have to have strong glasses when you've over 50 and then you just scroll down and click. It's not that hard. I can show you how to do it.

KING: No, thanks. You've been rough on Bush and Cheney.

BARR: I've been rough on...

KING: Very rough haven't you?

BARR: No. I don't think I've been rough on them, no, not at all. I think they've been rough on the country but I don't think anybody could be rough enough on them. You know they -- I don't like what they're doing and neither does anybody else. And I'm so glad now that it's like proof that nobody liked it and they want it to stop.

KING: We're going to take a break, come back with Roseanne Barr. She's hot again. And her HBO special, very hot, is out on DVD, "Roseanne Barr Blonde and Bitchin'." As we go to break, here's a clip.


BARR: I hate Bush. I hate the president. I hate the president! I hate the president! I hate the president!




JON STEWART, "THE DAILY SHOW WITH JON STEWART: Last week, President Bush and Vice President Cheney sat down with the new Democratic leaders in a meeting that fell somewhere on the (INAUDIBLE) scale between meeting the parents of the girl you knocked up and telling your new neighbors you're a sex offender.

DAVID LETTERMAN, "LATE SHOW WITH DAVID LETTERMAN": Travel plans tomorrow, President Bush is leaving for Vietnam. I guess this time his father couldn't get him out of it. JAY LENO, "THE TONIGHT SHOW WITH JAY LENO": This past weekend we celebrated Veterans Day. President Bush took a moment to thank his father for keeping him from becoming one. I thought that was nice.


KING: You like all that stuff being rough on our commander-in- chief?

BARR: I do. Yes. I want to talk about my last joke where I'm going, "I hate the president. I hate the president." You left off the punch line which is, "Is it still legal to say that?" Because it's more a joke about...

KING: That clears it up better.

BARR: know, yes, it's more -- I don't really hate Bush, you know.

KING: Let's discuss other things, the war on drugs, what do you make of it? Are you those -- do you favor legalization? What do you think?

BARR: Legalization, I just feel like it's a big excuse to, you know -- I just, I look at it like this. If they can't keep drugs out of the prisons, they're really not going to keep them out of every other place, you know. If they can't even keep them out of prison, we shouldn't maybe be throwing money to keep them out of every other place that isn't prison.

KING: Well your views, I guess it's hard for people to explain how they came upon their own views, but they certainly wouldn't be the view of let's say a majority of Utah.

BARR: No, they were not the views of the majority of people in Utah.

KING: So, were you rebellious as a kid? Did you...

BARR: No, I wasn't rebellious at all. I lived in that kind of a household. My father was a very political person and my grandfather was too and they were very pro-union. And so I was raised like to be really pro-union.

KING: In a non-union state.

BARR: Yes and I mean, you know, so were a lot of other people but, you know, they were always kind of at odds and fighting for like working people's rights and stuff like that. And that is really all politics breaks down to is like taking, you know, putting the working people against people at the top and taking their rights away.

I mean and especially for the last 50 years. You know, you've just seen it, especially since Reagan got in how the rights of working people have like totally been taken away. There's no GI Bill anymore. I mean when I grew up, when the soldiers came back from the war, you know, with a dollar they could buy their own house. That's how we honored and supported the troops then. But now they can't even get armor. I mean our country needs to like really, really look at itself and make things right that are wrong.

KING: You also grew up in a very religious state, the Mormon faith and in Utah.

BARR: Yes. Yes.

KING: Did you have a tough time with that?

BARR: I had a tough time with it only in that, you know, it kind of -- it was a tough time when I went through it but I think in the long run it really, really opened me up to being like able to have, you know, peace between two different sides.

It kind of like helped me to get to the point where I can listen to two different sides and I don't really have to like be at war with the other side. I can accept it and co-exist and live peacefully with it and respect it and every other thing, you know. It taught me a lot of great things.

KING: That's great. Let's go to an e-mail, Linda in Summerville, South Carolina. "What's your biggest regret?"

BARR: That I -- that I'm getting old that's a big regret.

KING: Yes, me too, except can't do anything about it.

BARR: No, can't do anything about it. But, you know, at least you could be honest about it and like really accept the fact that you are old and that maybe it is time for you to start moving on rather than using artificial ways to keep yourself alive at all the children's expense. I mean really that's kind of what it is.

KING: What are you saying?

BARR: I'm trying to say...

KING: Why are you staring?

BARR: ...if we're taking everything and putting it on the national Visa card and passing the interest on to our kids we can probably save them a lot of interest if we just like let ourselves go earlier and stuff like getting them artificial hearts and the lungs and the fake. You know we should just die when we're old and we should decide...

KING: Good luck and goodbye.

BARR: know, it's like 60 I think people especially of our generation. At 86 if they're, you know, they should just end their lives and that will like help save a lot of children.

KING: It would. It would reduce the population.

BARR: Yes but from the top down.

KING: OK, any thoughts on scientology?

BARR: No, I don't really care what anybody believes because, you know, that's just like an excuse to fight with people. I just like believe in unity and that if everybody pulled together we could actually solve a lot of problems and I'm like pro that and I like, really like talking about it. I like being on the Internet to talk about it. I like to talk about it wherever I go that it is a possibility that we could all work out our problems and learn to live together and do the right thing.

KING: Roseanne Barr will receive the coveted Trevor Award for work in the gay community. We're going to talk about gay marriage. Let's hear from her first on it.


BARR: I can't believe what a huge flack the whole gay marriage thing made in the election and how it still makes like a huge stink every place. I mean we've lost our minds and our common sense. If you think that gay sex is gross, then you should be for their right to marry because that will put an end to all that sex just like it does for the straight people.


BARR: Isn't that logical?

KING: Logical.

BARR: That's common sense.

KING: I'll pick up on it in a minute. We'll be right back with Roseanne Barr. Don't go away.


BARR: So I was like, "OK, I saw, OK, maybe I'll take out one of those personal ads so OK. Tell me what you think, OK, shy but assertive, DJS," that's divorced Jewish female for those of you unfamiliar with the personal ad lingo. "Looking for that perfect gent with just the right combination of cash, low self esteem and an oral fixation, must enjoy long romantic strolls to the kitchen, and appreciate the wonder and excitement of sharing the good life with a zesty gal who could snap at any second."




ROBIN WILLIAMS: I'm so excited. I was just in the hall getting some text messages from Representative Foley.


WILLIAMS: And I'm just saying "Come out, come out wherever you are."


KING: On same-sex marriage we closed the last bit with it. What do you think eight...

BARR: I just want to say about Foley though it's not his fault. He started out as an altar boy and he just got sucked into it.

KING: Eight -- I'll leave that alone -- eight statewide measures to ban same-sex marriage on last week's ballots. Voters in seven of those eight states voted in favor of a ban. Only Arizona refused to ban it. What do you make of same-sex marriage?

BARR: I don't understand why anybody should force themselves to suffer. I really, really don't. I am pro divorce. I don't believe that anyone who wants to stay married should have to stay married. I think everyone should rush out and get a divorce right now.


BARR: I think it's the greatest thing and I'm like totally pro divorce.

KING: Well, Neil Simon said someone must like it. Thirty million Americans have done it.

BARR: Yes, more people do it than stay married so.

KING: But we're talking about gay marriage.

BARR: Oh, what about it?

KING: What do you think of it?

BARR: You know I think it's really good for children for people who have children and I think that that's really what it's about is insurance for the children. I know people in my family who are gay and want to get married so that they can have insurance for their children and that's really what it's about insurance.

Again, it's like everything is spun so. We've lost the common sense of what things really mean. But, yes, people who are in a committed relationship raising children they should be able to extend the insurance payment to their children.

KING: People forget you kissed Mariel Hemingway on the lips in one of the most controversial moments in television history.

BARR: Yes, are you going to show a clip from that now?

KING: I don't know if they got one.

BARR: But I mean, you know.

KING: That looks kind of old now doesn't it?

BARR: Yes it's totally old and over now.

KING: But not when it happened.

BARR: No, not when it happened, you know, no. It was a big deal then. But now everybody is doing it so I've sort of moved on. Now I'm into kissing men.

KING: Ah. Do you think -- concerning Mark Foley, by the way...

BARR: Yes.

KING: do you feel about that do you feel sorry for him?

BARR: I think that, you know, in the long run, like in 100 years, I just like to look at things like that, if it helped kids to be more honest about child abuse and child sexual abuse it will have turned out to be a good thing because it did bring attention to that and, you know, it's all about that isn't it?

KING: What about the disgraced evangelist Ted Haggard?

BARR: I feel sorry for anybody who is like divided like that, you know, who says one thing and does another because I think that's a mental illness. And, you know, somebody who is real compelled to do something that they then have to turn around and cover up I think that, you know, with common sense, you know, mental illness can be cured, you know. I do.

KING: So you feel sorry for Ted Haggard?

BARR: I feel sorry for all of us. I feel sorry for people who are divided between doing right and doing wrong. I feel sorry for anybody who is in any conflict. I think it's time to like get over conflict and get solutions. I think that's the common sense thing to do.

KING: Roseanne Barr is our guest. We have an e-mail from Joan in Fort Thomas, Kentucky. "Does America validate only small people? Can someone above a size 2 succeed in America in business, in the workforce, in Hollywood?"

BARR: Well I guess so. I guess I'm the proof of that right?

KING: Yes, but you're still -- wouldn't you agree that today you got to be slim?

BARR: Well they want people to just starve themselves down to where they're nothing and that's supposed to look fashionable. I think it's to get people ready for the fact that probably the food supply is going to dwindle and they are going to be starving. And that's a whole new diet that you don't even need to join Jenny Craig or none of that to lose. It's just called poverty. And I think it's increasing. It's definitely increasing here so I don't really care about, you know, I'm going to eat everything I can.

KING: You're big on the minimum wage issue aren't you?

BARR: I'm so big on the minimum wage issue and I'm so thrilled that it passed. It passed. That means so much to people.

KING: In the states, yes.

BARR: I don't care about anything except for I know like the people who need to get more money to live and there's a lot of them, there's hundreds and thousands and millions of them. It's a good thing for them and I'm really glad that I could help with that. And, I'm really more than anything glad to have met the people who worked as minimum wage workers in this country to speak with them and meet them and thank them so much for the work they've done for me my whole life to bring the food to the table of people who have a lot of money.

KING: Federal minimum wage hasn't been increased in ten years.

BARR: In ten years. It's such a shame.

KING: We have a picture. I think we have a shot of you.

BARR: How could we have ever talked about morals in this country and not have included that?

KING: We have a clip of you with people on minimum wage. Let's watch.


BARR: It's seven days at minimum wage and I'm back and I'm not going away until several million of you good and wonderful people hear, see, and feel what it's like to try and have a life working at or near the federal minimum wage of $5.15 an hour.


KING: That is a little low.

BARR: Jesus.

KING: How can you make it on $5.15 an hour?

BARR: Well you can't and I mean if you go to the inner cities, you know, of any of our big cities you'll see how it doesn't work. Just because the news cameras don't go down there doesn't mean it isn't happening and people need to educate themselves by going on the Internet and like getting the right information because information in the hands of the people is awesome. That's what the election was about.

KING: But the administration... BARR: That's my two cents. I just want to say that.

KING: ...the administration says if you do that...

BARR: And I want to say that I learned this all at

KING: If you do that people are going to lose jobs.

BARR: Now that's what they say. It just means they won't have quite so much in bonuses for their wives' jewelry that year, you know. People at the bottom they'll have like, you know, maybe $50 more a week. You know there's -- we talked about raising the minimum wage. I think we need to next think about a maximum wage. That's not to say that rich people can't continue to get rich. That's cool but not to the point where people are, you know, refugees at the bottom.

KING: What would be your maximum?

BARR: It's a pyramid scam and it's not going to last.

KING: What's your maximum?

BARR: Pyramid scams don't last.

KING: What's your maximum wage?

BARR: I think everyone should, you know, I think...

KING: Tops, what?

BARR: I think everyone should be able to live a decent life in this country.

KING: Do you have a maximum wage?

BARR: Like it used to be, like that used to be our goal way back when in the '60s. We had that goal. What happened to it?

KING: Do you have a maximum wage figure like $1 million no one should...

BARR: I do have a figure. I think, you know, OK, let's say it's $100 million. Now anybody ought to be able to live on $100 million.

KING: That you can, yes.

BARR: OK, and that is not being -- that's not being a greedy bitch, Larry.

KING: I think you can make it.

BARR: That's being real common sense fair. Anyone can make it on $100 million and over that you're a pig.

KING: That's right.

BARR: You got to give something, build a road, build a school. Come on, give something back.

KING: You make $100 million you better scrimp and save.

BARR: That's right.

KING: Right. We'll be right back with Roseanne Barr. Don't go away.


BARR: But the men are nicer I think and they do some things better than women. Like, OK, reading the maps way better on reading the maps and the linear thinking there, the map reading, because only the male mind could conceive of one inch equaling 100 miles. We got to give that to them.



KING: Before we take some calls, what do you think of this young wave in Hollywood, the Lindsay Lohans, the Hiltons?

BARR: I feel sorry for those girls, they're hungry. I know they're hungry. Yes, that's why they smoke, and have those kind of drugs that speed you up so you don't feel hungry. They should just eat.

KING: Why are they doing it, do you think?

BARR: Because they, you know, they don't like the woman's shape. It's too threatening.

KING: Look at that, are you jealous of that?

BARR: They've got to look like a boy with big breast implants.

KING: Are you jealous of that?

BARR: Of what?

KING: That build.

BARR: When I was a little girl I was jealous of it because I was in Utah and I was the fat little Jewish girl and all the girls looked like Paris Hilton. And I just felt like such a troll my whole life.

KING: You had Barbie dolls, I bet.

BARR: Yes.

KING: Jefferson City, Missouri, hello.

CALLER: Hello.

KING: HI. CALLER: Yes, I wanted to ask Roseanne, is there anyone that she would like to see run for president in 2008?

BARR: Well, I don't know. But I'll tell you one thing that I will be looking at and that is is that person looking at, you know, the majority of people who are the working people in this country? Are they including them or excluding them?

And I would like make them work for it before, you know, I would endorse anybody or even say their name. I mean, I don't even know that they are going to incorporate anything about working class America or even middle class America in the next election. They got away with it for two elections where neither one of those parties ever discussed it. Now what? I don't know. I don't -- I just want them to be able to listen to people.

KING: E-mail from Christopher in Washington, Missouri. "I'm curious to hear what you think of the current network sitcoms."

BARR: Well, I went on that Earl show, you know, and I loved that one.

KING: That's funny.

BARR: That one I like because it's real deep and it's about karma and I think it's really cool right now to be talking about karma and thinking about karma and stuff. And I think it's smart and futuristic. But the rest of them I don't get so much.

KING: You don't -- you don't like them?

BARR: I just get that one real good.

KING: Tulsa, Oklahoma, hello.

CALLER: Hello.


CALLER: Larry, I've been a fan of yours for years. And Roseanne, please keep speaking out for the working people. Are you ever going to get married again, you think?

BARR: No. I don't believe in marriage. I'm pro-divorce.

KING: Why are you so adamant?

BARR: Because it's just like, you know, it doesn't really -- I'm not ever going to do it because I'm no good at it. That's all I can say. I just think that people like me who are no good at it, that have tried it at least two or three times, don't try it no more. Move on. That's it. You failed. Move on. Quick trying to fix it. Just move on. Start crocheting and doing something useful. Don't inflict that on your loved ones any further.

KING: Do you keep in touch with any ex-husbands? BARR: Yes, I do.

KING: That's good that you can have a relationship?

BARR: I didn't say relationship but I do keep in touch.

KING: What about Tom Arnold?

BARR: I'm a little in touch with that person and wish them the best. And, you know, all that other...

KING: ... Have you gotten over all of those things that you were into, you appeared on this show a few times years ago about seeing -- being harmed as a child and tracing back to infant infant hood and realizing things that happened to you?

BARR: What?

KING: You're telling me you don't know what I'm talking about?

BARR: I kind of do but what's your question. Make it more specific. Which part do you want me to talk about?

KING: When you look back on that, were you wrong, mistaken?

BARR: I was mistaken in many, many ways, yes, yes. I was mistaken in many ways.

KING: Because we did some very dramatic shows here, Roseanne. You will remember that.

BARR: Yes, I sure do. I don't remember your shows because I was too busy living it. But, yes, I do remember it. I lived it, uh-huh.

KING: Was it tough to break out of?

BARR: It was very, very tough. It so required me, like, pulling all of my various energies together and uniting my various energies, the various thoughts, the various everything, uniting them into one whole thing that, like, does what it says it is going to do and does what it says it believes. That thing. Integration, it's called. It really helped me, yes, it did.

KING: Are you happy to be back doing stand-up? Is that your favorite thing to do?

BARR: It's like -- it's such a meditation for me. It's like, you know, it's a great meditation. And it's kind of like how I like really recast my whole life. I recast everything about me that I don't like. I recalibrate it. I fix it up and I take it there and do it. It's like I can set a goal and reach it. It's just a magical thing.

KING: Do you know you've got them before you go on stage?

BARR: Got them? KING: I mean, do you know they're going to laugh? Do you know you've got the audience?

BARR: No, I never do because I'm too goofy with that kind of thing. So I just go out and try to get them. And I find out when I like try to get them, it's better when I try than when I go, they're not going to like me. It's like a lot of different things I had to put together, a lot of hoses to fill, I think.

KING: Do you ever bomb?

BARR: A bomb?

KING: Do you ever bomb?

BARR: I -- I'm going to say this right now without trying to drive myself too crazy. No. I never bomb anymore. I -- I kind of worked it through and I never bomb with it anymore. For a while I did. But all comics do. Sometimes you really, really bomb.

KING: Sure.

BARR: That's how you get better.

KING: We'll be back with Roseanne Barr on this edition of LARRY KING LIVE. Don't go away.


BARR: I love those "Girls Gone Wild" ads, too. They scare me. Every time I scare those ads I thank god that none of my daughters ever went to college. So scary. I always think, is that what we were fighting for? Is that what us, like, women in the '60s, the whole thing, fighting for so our daughters could go acting like that? I mean, where are their mothers to tell them that it is wrong to just like lift up your shirt and do all that kind of (EXPLETIVE DELETED) for free. That's wrong.




JAY LENO, HOST "TONIGHT SHOW": I got to tell you. I great deal on eBay today. I didn't tell you about this.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: MALE: Oh, what did you get, man?

LENO: I bought Britney Spears' old couch for $50. Still had Kevin Federline laying on it. How about that?

LENO: As you may have heard, they're getting divorced. Kevin Federline and Brittany breaking up. And Kevin is asking for sole custody of the two joys of his life and Brittany said, no, the implants are staying in. (LAUGHTER)

Sources say the pre-nup in -- Britney Spears made Kevin Federline sign, is 60 pages long. Yes.

The first page handles who gets the money and next 59 pages handle who gets the trucker hats.


KING: What do you make of this whole thing, Britney and Kevin Federline? Like, what do you make of this?

BARR: I just feel story for both of them. I feel real sorry for their kids and everything.

KING: The kids you've got to worry about.

BARR: Yes, I mean, it's hard to be in the public eye and going through personal things. I just hope they'll all be okay.

Larry, you've got to let me say about acorn?

KING: Oh, yes, acorn.

BARR: Go online and read everything about acorn at It's like a...

KING: What is acorn?

BARR: Acorn is A Community Reform Now. And it's like -- it's been around for about 40 years. It, like, helps everywhere in the country to raise the minimum wage and do all kinds of thing for workers and, especially for Katrina, it's big there, too.

KING: Acorn? How do you find it?

BARR: And it's in every city in the United States.

KING: How do you find it?



BARR: Thank you, Larry.

KING: And also, if you want to go to Rosie's website, it's

And we go to Huntsville, Alabama.



CALLER: Hi. Roseanne?



I want to first say thank you for many, many years of entertainment. My daughter Madison and I absolutely love your show.

BARR: Thank you.

CALLER: And she would like to know, in retrospect, are you happy with the way the show ended?

BARR: Yes, I am real happy with the way the show ended because -- you know why? Because it ended how I wanted it to end. And you know, I like how it turned out and I think that if people will give it a shot now when it comes out in its ninth season -- and I'm going to, like, narrate the whole thing and tell everybody why I did what I did, why they won the lottery, what was really going on. And I look forward to that. I hope people will be into it.

KING: We have an e-mail from Shannon in -- Vy (ph) in Shannon, Illinois. Vy in Shannon, Illinois. Would you consider doing another show like the "Roseanne Show" you did before?

BARR: Well, as I always say, Larry, I would consider it but only if there's nudity. And so far none of these networks have...

KING: Why did that show make it? How long was it on?

BARR: It was on for nine years.

KING: Why did it make it?

BARR: It made it because of -- I think, for number one, John Goodman and Lori and, you know, Sarah -- and Sarah and those people that were the family. I mean, that's the thing that kept me hooked, is the family.

KING: And the writing wasn't bad.

BARR: The actors, like, the actors are just all so awesome. I think people liked the acting.

KING: Pataski (ph), Michigan.


CALLER: Hi, Larry, Roseanne.

Roseanne, we know you've great success in television and stand-up comedy. Would you be interested in doing movies again?

BARR: I don't know. I like being on the Internet. I have my own studio and I do whatever I want. If I want to make a little movie for myself, I go in my studio and make it. You know, I'm, like, living in my studio and putting it up on the Internet.

And I'm, like, sort of living right now for, like, inventing my own little television network on the Net. And I'm going to, like, do my own little shows in it and put people I like in it, and all kinds of stuff.

KING: How do you keep on keeping on? What -- how do you keep going?

BARR: I keep going because -- I largely keep going, Larry, because, like, you know, I guess I decided that I wanted to try to leave something really, really good behind me. That is a great energizer, that you realize, oh, my God, I could do something really, really good. That's so energizing. It's more energizing than, you know, food even, anything. It's cool that I can maybe do something good.

KING: We'll take a break. We're going to be back with more of Roseanne Barr, more of your calls, some more e-mails, too.

Don't go away.


UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: That's your table, sis.

They're kind of cute, aren't they?

BARR: You know, I have couple kids at home just their age. I think I can relate to them.

Get out!



KING: We're back.

John King is sitting in for Anderson Cooper tonight to host "AC 360".

Jonathan, what's up?

JOHN KING, CNN ANCHOR: Thank you, Larry.

Great program tonight.

Coming up at the top of the hour right here on "360", for a city and a country seeing the worst of the worse every day, today sadly most have set a new low.

Dozen and dozens of people kidnapped in one shot by 80 kidnappers in Baghdad's broad daylight. No one knows exactly how it happened and no one knows exactly who the kidnappers were, but it clearly raises fresh concerns about the insurgents' ability to operate with impunity in a city with 60,000 American and Iraqi troops.

Plus, one day after Rudy Giuliani files his early presidential papers, already people are saying, maybe he doesn't have what it takes to represent the Republican Party.

We'll take a look at that and a whole lot more, Larry, at the top of the hour.

KING: Thanks, John.

We look forward to that, "AC 360" hosted by John King at 10:00 Eastern, 7:0 Pacific..

We have a call from Los Angeles for Roseanne Barr.


CALLER: Hi, Larry. Nice to meet you.

KING: Thank you.

CALLER: Roseanne...



I'm a political activist, a struggling writer here in L.A., and I'd like to know what your thoughts are on the wealthy Americans, particularly those in the entertainment industry, that seem to go abroad to adopt children, when I have people right here stepping over bodies in L.A., you know, people that are starving -- kids -- little kids that are just starving here that need parents.

What do you think of this kind of thing?

KING: That's referring to Madonna.

BARR: Well, you know, you don't want to say anything to -- negative about anybody.

But, you know, maybe we should adopt a whole village of people, not just one. You know, I mean, maybe we should, like, go back there and get a whole, like, village full of people.

KING: Raise them all.

BARR: Well, I mean, the people have a lot of money. And it doesn't take a lot of money to turn a whole village around.

KING: Speaking of Madonna, in the HBO stand-up comedy special, you do a riotous strip tease in honor of no one other than Madonna. Let's take a look.

BARR: Oh, my god, are you going to show that?

KING: Hey, you're hot.

BARR: I know I am.

KING: That's pretty wild. Sue from Altoona, Pennsylvania has an e-mail. "Why hasn't Roseanne ever appeared on Oprah? "

BARR: I have. I've been on there nine times.

KING: Oh, you're wrong on that. She gets along with Oprah. Do you get along with Rosie, too?

BARR: Yes.

KING: Going on "The View?"

BARR: I just don't go anywhere. I stay in my house and I go to my studio. I don't do a lot more than that, to tell you the real truth.

KING: But you get along with Oprah?

BARR: I get along with everybody. That's my mission on earth, is to force myself to get along with people, even that I don't like. I can still get along with them...

KING: Houston...

BARR: ... Even if I hate them and stuff I can still get along with them.

KING: Houston, Texas, hello.

CALLER: Hi, I would like to ask Rosie what the significance behind the rooster T-shirt that they wore on her show?

BARR: Well, everybody talks about it. And if you go to Roseanne World I'll write something about it in the next couple of days.

KING: Can't you tell us?

BARR: Well, it takes too long. I would have to write two whole paragraphs to answer that. Go over to and I'll write about it, I swear to god, in the next two days, I will.

KING: How often do you write on your Web site?

BARR: i write 24/7. I get up and I'm like a big old transmitter. If it's like 3:00 a.m. and something comes in, this pipe, I run down and put it out there. If somebody comes down this pipe, I run it out there. I'm getting a lot of transmissions from other dimensions and I want and represented on the net.

KING: Oh, no, we're not back to that again.

BARR: Well, that's all part of it. It's about thinking outside the box. How much more outside the box can you be when you're like actually get outside that box? You might find out that there is a whole cyber world.

KING: Is someone transmitting to you now?

BARR: Yes, someone is always transmitting through me, always.

KING: Do you have a transmitter -- does he or she have a name, your transmitter?

BARR: Just -- it's just -- no, it does not have a name.

KING: Just --

BARR: And even if it did, I would not be able to be speaketh it.

KING: Be speaketh it. But it is an it?

BARR: Well, I don't know if it's an it. It's an energy. It's an energy. It's an energy.

KING: It's an energy.

BARR: It's an energy that cannot be contained.

KING: Imagine someone just tuning in and having a little booze. We'll be right back with more moments with Roseanne after this.


BARR: We forgot that drugs are bad in this country, I think. We sort of forgot. Like, you know, they sell them on TV like it's candy. But they're bad. Drugs are bad. Like Viagra, that is a bad, bad drug, ladies and gentlemen. You know what I'm talking about. It's a bad, bad drug. Some things are just supposed to end, ladies and gentlemen.




BARR: There is nothing you cannot get a fat person to do to lose weight. Except for stopping like a (BLEEP) hog and do some exercise. That would be extreme.


KING: Has losing weight always been hard for you?

BARR: What a question.

KING: What do you mean, what a question?

BARR: Yes. Well, actually not just losing it because I can always lose it. It's just keeping it off. Now, that part is where it's not good. KING: When you lose it, what sends you back?

BARR: It's just -- it's actually just an obsessive compulsive disorder, you know, like you have to do the thing you don't really want to do. So like, you're all divided, you know, when you are doing the thing you don't really want to do, then you have to cover it up, then you have to lie about it, then you have to pretend you don't do it. Then you have to blah, blah, blah. Just, I don't know.

KING: Final e-mail from Jeannie in Columbus, Ohio. "Are you planning any books in the near future?"

BARR: I was thinking about maybe publishing a book of the people who have written on my Web site over the past 10 years because I've really discovered a lot of really great writers. And I'm thinking of like doing a compilations of their work and I really am thinking about that today.

There are just a lot of people out there who are very, very talented. And I like to help people, you know. I like to not pull the ladder up behind me. I like to kind of help people if I can and I've discovered a lot of really good ones, a lot of good writers.

KING: Are you working all day? When you get up in the morning are you writing and thinking and working? Is it a constant thing with you? What are you staring at it?

BARR: Yes, I guess so. I'm thinking -- yes, yes, I guess I'm always -- always at the laptop. That's how I relax. I love talking to people. I don't know. I'm crazy, I guess.

KING: Do you talk to strangers online?

BARR: I talk to strangers, yes.

KING: Oh, my god.

BARR: I do. I talk to strangers.

KING: Isn't that a little, for want of a better term, sicko?

BARR: I say, well, they're not strangers for long.

KING: But you don't know who they are?

BARR: Well, they're checked out, for god's sake. I don't -- I kind of talk to them in mass. You no, with bulletins, it's called, Larry. That's how it works. Bulletins and stuff like that. But I do a call-in show every Wednesday night in my studio and I do indeed want to hear from people who have not been heard, who are crazy, think they're talking to God, have...

KING: ... The call-in show is through the Web site?

BARR: Yes, it's through my Web site. And you know, anybody who thinks that God is talking to them right now and telling them how to save the world, I want to help you be heard.

KING: He called me this morning, he said you'd be a terrific guest.

BARR: Who did?

KING: The big man.

BAR: Oh, that's cool.

KING: OK. If you want to check in, go to Right?

BARR: Thank you so much.

KING: Delight having you, dear.

BARR: You know I don't like shaking hands. Oh, I shook your hand. Oh, you're the first person I shook hands with for about 10 years. But it's not that freaky.

KING: Germs? Roseanne Barr, Blonde N' Bitchin'. Is it germs that you're afraid of?

BARR: Yes, germs.

KING: Tomorrow night on LARRY KING LIVE, get this, Suzanne Somers will debate a group of doctors who disagree strongly with her anti-aging theories. Suzanne Somers versus doctors.

BARR: She's older than me.

KING: Tomorrow night, she is. She's 60. Right now let's go to New York where John King stands by to pitch in for Anderson Cooper, hosting "A.C. 360." John?


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