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Rutgers Student Privacy Trial
Aired March 16, 2012 - 21:00 ET
THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.
DR. DREW PINSKY, HOST: Here we go.
Tonight, I am making the rounds of the stories you are talking about.
A troubled veteran allegedly guns down -- get this -- his little sister and his mother is still missing. Then, guilty verdict in a sensational daycare murder case, and the Rutgers student privacy trial.
We`ve got a lot to explore here. So, let`s get started.
PINSKY: We are at it again -- innocent victims at the hands of gun violence. We are looking at the people at the center of the stories: an 11-year-old girl shot dead, her mother missing, feared injured or dead. The alleged suspect: their beloved brother and son, a 27-year-old Iraq war veteran, reportedly suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder.
Here is what one family friend had to say about this. Take a look.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: They didn`t want to be around him because I guess some of the kids -- some of them knew that he would carry a gun like in the back of his pocket, back of his pants.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PINSKY: According to family members, the young veteran, Abel Gutierrez, often threatened to kill himself, would sit on the sofa, twirling a handgun, and brandishing a rifle.
A spokesperson for Veteran Affairs said Gutierrez had been receiving care at a V.A. facility.
Now, people that may be wondering how somebody who was contemplating killing themselves would then kill other people. You`re using your brain, which is not in a disorder state, the rational part of your brain to evaluate these things. When someone is not in a normal state, the thinking becomes part of the problem.
When there`s mental illness, depression, bipolar, thinking -- even addiction -- thinking is disturbed. It is a good idea to do things that are not a good idea.
Criminal defense attorney Mark Eiglarsh joins me; Sheryl Lee Ralph, an actress, singer and author of "Redefining Diva"; and Darren Kavinoky, legal analyst. He`s the host of "Deadly Sins" on Investigation Discovery, Saturday night.
This is my panel for making the rounds tonight.
Darren, who is guilty of failing this veteran?
DARREN KAVINOKY, LEGAL ANALYST: Look, I`m a huge proponent of personal accountability, because I think to fail to do so is to be a victim. However, this is a systemic breakdown, when we send our young people as a nation, when we train them to kill, send them off to war, it was also reported that he would talk about his experiences serving, that he would kill these people.
When we do that, we as society, the United States government, that system that sends them off to fight, they are responsible for returning them in the same state of good health or to that state of good health.
PINSKY: Sheryl Lee, I hear you nodding yes.
SHERYL LEE RALPH, ACTRESS: You know what? You and I have had these conversations over and over that we as a country just do not want to pay attention to mental illness. These young people come back to us, they come back to us, and they`re hurt, their illness, we`re not able to see it, because like you keep saying, it`s inside their head.
But there were some visual signs. When he was carrying that gun, when he said over and over that he wanted to kill himself, when the people in the community no longer wanted to be in his company, those were huge signs -- look, we`ve got a problem here. But we as a community don`t know what to do when we see these signs.
PINSKY: Well, listen -- just being aware of them, talking about these kinds of people tonight and hopefully referring. We got a Facebook from Randy who says, can we please have better psychiatric care for our vets?
PINSKY: Here`s what you`re saying. "They are fighting for our freedom and don`t even know us. This is the least we can do for them."
I think we all agree on that.
PINSKY: Let me talk, giver Sabrina -- this is Sabrina, another Facebook. "My dad is a Vietnam vet," a whole different era. "He didn`t go around shooting innocent people and all. Why are we still making excuses for them?"
I`ll go to Mark Eiglarsh. I haven`t heard from him.
I know we`re shaking our head no. But, Mark, what do you say to that?
MARK EIGLARSH, CRIMINAL DEFENSE ATTORNEY: Well, I say that that person is doing the best they can at their level of awareness, they just don`t get mental disorders. You know, 30 percent of those that come back from Iraq and Afghanistan suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder. What`s alarming is that only less than 50 percent are getting the help they need, and the reason why -- and there`s two major reasons -- fear of stigmatization.
EIGLARSH: And also they`re concerned about their career. I think they need to do a little more in that arena.
PINSKY: Before you guys go on, I`m jumping to the next topic. This is a corollary of what we`ve been talking about. Gun control triggered an explosive debate right here during last night when we discovered three stories detailing injury or death of three children all under the age of 10. The shooters themselves, people pulling the trigger were also under the age of 10 -- and all came from one tiny county in Washington. Take a look at this.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
PAMELA GELLER, AUTHOR: The death of these children destroyed these people`s lives. I honestly don`t believe a nanny state is the answer. Accidents happen. This is purely anecdotal, and exception makes bad law. We have seen that time and time again.
LISA BLOOM, ATTORNEY: So, when a police officer leaves a loaded gun in a car and a 3-year-old gets his hands on it and shoots himself in this horrific tragedy, there should be no legal consequences? I mean, that`s your position?
GELLER: I think the fact this man lost his child is a terrible, terrible tragedy.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PINSKY: Sheryl, I`m going to jump to you. You`re a mom. You keep guns in the home, do we hold the guns responsible, the gun laws responsible, or parents responsible -- or all of the above?
RALPH: You know something? It is a combination of all of the above. I do not keep guns in my home because I believe that if you have guns around you, there`s a good chance you or somebody you know will get shot by that gun. What do they say, "Live by the gun, die by the gun"?
PINSKY: But if you are a parent, there`s one thing you know -- these little children are like little computers. They watch everything. They get everything.
You can`t just have a gun laying around. And even at your best efforts, they will climb to see and find what they find so interesting. You can`t just do it.
PINSKY: Darren, you want to comment on this? Sheryl, thank you.
KAVINOKY: Well, fundamentally, there`s even a larger issue. And Wayne Dyer said it best, when he said that fighting for peace made as much sense as screwing for virginity. There`s just a fundamental breakdown here in the world of gun ownership, the violence that we see throughout society.
I think it`s a larger issue that goes unaddressed largely and that this is the symptom, not the problem.
PINSKY: Mark, a nanny state, is that the answer? Should the government be crawling into every aspect of our lives?
EIGLARSH: Listen, it`s not black, it`s not white. The debate last night, they were going back and forth. It`s great. Parents need to take responsibility and tougher gun laws. It`s not a bad thing. Both.
RALPH: Absolutely . And when you lose a child, there is no greater pain. And to think that there might have been something --
PINSKY: Yes, I know.
RALPH: -- that you could have done to save that child?
PINSKY: Yes. Well, maybe these people would start speaking up about these issues and we will learn from them.
Now, another story. I`m sad to report that cyber bullying is again in the national spotlight as a verdict is reached in the trial of Rutgers University student accused of spying on and intimidating his homosexual roommate, 18-year-old Tyler Clementi.
Take a look at this tape.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: On count one, invasion of privacy, we find the defendant guilty or not guilty as to T.C.?
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Guilty.
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Did commit the offense of invasion of privacy under circumstances that caused T.C. to be intimidated, reasonably believed that he was selected to be targeted of the offense because of sexual orientation, guilty or not guilty?
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Guilty.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PINSKY: That defendant you`re looking at there, Dharun Ravi, was found guilty on the major counts and faces maximum 10 year prison sentence.
Now, this is a very complicated story -- intimidation, spying.
Did you agree with the verdict? Did the jury get this right?
KAVINOKY: I`m not surprised by the verdicts. It was a clean sweep for the prosecution. Obviously, Ravi is now looking at significant amount of time in prison.
PINSKY: I`m going to stop you because the reports out there on the Internet is that it was a mixed verdict. I see it as a clean sweep.
KAVINOKY: It is. And what`s confusing is that there are certain counties that had specific factual findings.
PINSKY: But they were not -- they were sort of irrelevant to the big picture. Big picture: guilty of intimidation, of spying --
KAVINOKY: And --
PINSKY: -- and guilty of doing it not out of hate, in order words, it wasn`t received as a hate crime, but out of intent to intimidate.
KAVINOKY: And bottom line is the same, clean sweep for the prosecution and from the hindsight is 20/20 file, there was an offer prior to trial that involved no jail.
KAVINOKY: One of the things that`s most troubling about this case for me is that in this particular jurisdiction, or in this courtroom, those jurors went back to deliberate with no jury instructions and they didn`t take their notes. So, they`re left to reach their verdict and render that verdict based on the gestalt of what happened rather than being able to see each --
PINSKY: And it was clean sweep.
My panel stays with me as we make the rounds.
And next, we`ll take a look at Dunwoody daycare murder trial.
And why the soccer mom madam -- oh, yes, we`re getting into that story, has a new attorney and who uses the -- who are the guys that use this woman. That`s what I want to know.
Stay with us.
PINSKY: And welcome back.
We are continuing to make the rounds, looking at the people at the center of the stories, people acting interestingly all this week. Yesterday, there was a verdict in the Dunwoody daycare murder case. The jury found Hemy Neuman guilty but mentally ill in the shooting of Rusty Sneiderman in the parking lot of a Dunwoody, Georgia daycare facility.
Last fall, Neuman changed his plea from guilty to not guilty by reason of insanity, but the jury didn`t buy it.
District attorney implied in his closing argument that Sneiderman`s widow was a co-conspirator in her husband`s murder. It was rumored that she and Neuman were having an affair. Both denied it.
Look at some quick trial highlights here.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: He is insane, he sees angels, he sees demons, he is crazy. Something is wrong with me.
HEMY NEUMAN: I did not pull the trigger on the gun that killed Rusty Sneiderman.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: If you cannot trust the ingredients on this insanity sandwich, the I`m going to ask you, don`t eat it.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Why didn`t you call us?
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Because they just told me something happened to Rusty, what are the chances he`s answering his cell phone?
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Can we deny (INAUDIBLE) from Andrea because Andrea already knew.
We`ll give you everything you need to look at. When done, take off his mask, look him in the face, and see him for who he really is. I`m a lingering, lying, murderous coward.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PINSKY: Well, even though Darren liked that prosecutor`s haircut, Mark, I`m going to you. Do you think the D.A. will bring charges against the widow, Andrea Sneiderman?
EIGLARSH: Probably not, unless they`ve got evidence. I mean, to know something -- we know what Casey Anthony did, but she walks free. To know something is not to have evidence beyond a reasonable doubt. As of right now, you`re not going to offer him a deal to flip against her. His testimony means nothing.
So where is the evidence? So I don`t think so.
PINSKY: Sheryl Lee, for me, I responded to that case less in the legal nuances and more the idea that somebody`s dad was shot in a kids` daycare parking lot. Did you have a reaction to this case? It was disgusting.
RALPH: It`s so upsetting because obviously somebody is not telling the truth somewhere, and you could tell by that gentleman`s whole reaction and demeanor. He was definitely ashamed of something that had gone on.
But the fact that two children are now left without their father, and for what, what seems like just a whole lot of pack of lies.
PINSKY: Sheryl Lee, I love you.
And, Darren, I will go to you with your fancy haircut and all.
The mentally ill, this is confusing to me. By reasons of insanity, I think I understand. That I think you educated me in the past rarely sticks.
What is this now, he is guilty but mentally ill?
KAVINOKY: And even less basically, short version, jury not buying it, off he goes to prison for the rest of his life, plus an additional five years for use of the gun. So -- and jurors often are troubled by mental health defenses for reasons that we`ve talked about, that is -- unlike physical injury, people can`t see mental health issues.
And by the way, although I agree with Mark on lots of different stuff, and I certainly acknowledge there would be problems going after Sneiderman, the D.A.`s office and the defense team both pointed the accusatory finger at Sneiderman.
KAVINOKY: Well, The D.A.`s office is making noise like they`re going to.
PINSKY: All right.
KAVINOKY: It`s a maybe. It`s a maybe.
PINSKY: But she seemed a little funny on the stand.
But, Mark, I am going to the next case. A soccer mom who is accused of running a million dollar prostitution ring from an Upper East Side New York apartment. Forty-four-year-old Anna Gristina has four children, I believe that -- is that her? Neighbors watch women come and go. She looks different in the courtroom, I must say.
My stage manager is really into her. The neighbors -- cameraman likes her, too. Coming and going all hours of the night. Prosecutors say the clients were powerful figures in politics, banking, entertainment, law enforcement.
Yesterday, Christina fired her attorney, Peter Gleason. Now, we are wondering this after watching the interview with Matt Lauer with Gleason on the "Today" show. So, I`m going to show you that to you right now. Take a look.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
MATT LAUER, NBC NEWS: Are you qualified to defend this woman? You never handled a felony criminal case before. Are you qualified to this?
PETER GLEASON, FORMER ATTORNEY FOR ANNA GRISTINA: I`m an attorney licensed to practice law in the state of New York, which allows me to walk into any courtroom in this state.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PINSKY: That`s it, Mark. I get a license to practice law, then I`ll take any case -- Mark.
EIGLARSH: I don`t know that he`s qualified to handle it -- especially you got the whole media component. What amazes me is that this guy now is allowing her to stay in his house, he`s offering to help with bond, and he`s letting her stay in his house.
Now, I thought I was generous validating clients` parking. Maybe their feelings, when I`m in a good mood, I`ll validate their feelings, but my goodness.
PINSKY: Sheryl Lee, you have been in this town a long time, both New York and southern California. Who are the guys that do this? Do you know? You met any of these guys?
That`s what fascinates me. Who are the guys heading to the Upper East Side, finding a soccer mom?
RALPH: I just wish I knew. But my God, look at the way she looks. This woman had to be living some sort of a double life, because you`re right, Dr. Drew, the woman we saw in court was not the woman we saw in the photographs, darling.
And look at that arm candy she`s got. But then on top of it, her lawyers --
PINSKY: So, Sheryl Lee, you`re saying how do you lead this double life like that? Is that what you`re getting into here?
RALPH: I`m telling you -- oh, my gosh! I mean, this woman has it going on, after she got her lawyer to say come stay at my house.
PINSKY: Yes. See, I think there`s more to be revealed. They have been investigating five years. There`s a huge bail. Usually, it`s more of a wrist slap, isn`t there, for this kind of thing?
KAVINOKY: Well, on the point of bail, by the way -- her bail is way too high. When we`re looking --
PINSKY: Isn`t there more that`s coming out? Maybe somebody --
KAVINOKY: Oh, there is, yes, yes, yes. Especially names.
PINSKY: And I think some names are going to come out here that are going to shock people, I suspect.
RALPH: It always does.
KAVINOKY: And on the issue of that bail, when we`re talking bail, we`re talking about flight risk or danger to the community, she`s neither. Why she`s still a resident at Riker`s Island? There`s a little bit --
PINSKY: I don`t know. I saw what she did to the stage manager, the cameraman here, I think she`s a little bit dangerous.
Sheryl Lee is planning a new life here. I mean, she`s converting people right and left.
All right, guys. What if a doctor commissions an anti-Semitic video to promote his practice? Does it make a difference if the doctor himself is Jewish? That is next.
PINSKY: Welcome back.
We are continuing to make the rounds on this week`s stories and the people in the middle of the stories.
I`m here with actress Sheryl Lee Ralph, and attorneys Darren Kavinoky and Mark Eiglarsh.
As I said, we are discussing the people making interesting news. Here now is a story, I`m not sure if I can let go of the soccer mom madam yet. I don`t know. It`s still staying with me.
Sorry, Sheryl Lee, I know you are planning another life here, but I`m going to have to move on to this story.
A Florida plastic surgeon is under an ethics investigation for commissioning a promotional music video about, quote, "Jewcan Scam," a fictional Jewish teenager.
Now, I have to warn you, many people find this video offensive. Take a look.
(VIDEO CLIP PLAYS)
PINKSY: And goes on to sing, quote, "I`ll love you forever if you get your nose circumcised," unquote.
The song, of course, blatantly anti-Semitic, but the surgeon, Dr. Michael Salzauer, I think it`s how he pronounces his name, and the band members are all Jewish.
Mark, does that make a difference or is that still just as offensive if not?
EIGLARSH: Is there any reason you`re coming to the big nosed Jew first? Is there any reason why you`re coming to me? Just wondering.
PINSKY: Excuse me. Let me ask my next guest. Let me ask my next guest.
EIGLARSH: I`ll answer.
PINSKY: OK. Go ahead, Mark. I knew you won`t release television time. So go ahead.
EIGLARSH: No. Well, listen, I watched this with my wife. We think the band actually has some promise. This doctor, I wouldn`t let him clip the toe nails of my dog. I mean, I can`t imagine this is his idea of good promotion.
I found it offensive for sure. Not outrageously offensive. He didn`t need a skull cap on the kid that stars in this video. It wasn`t necessary.
What I found most offensive that he`s targeting people`s frailty. He says he`s suggesting you`ll have a wonderful life if somehow you get a nose job. That`s just offensive.
PINSKY: I`m going to Sheryl Lee.
Sheryl Lee, I am a big advocate of comedy being free to explore wherever it needs to go -- to enlighten, it shines a light on things. It makes us -- through irony and other uses, it shines a truth.
How do we hold -- where should we draw the line?
RALPH: You know something, I`m sorry, to me it seems like there`s no hate like self hate. But on the flip side, there`s no love like Shiksa love.
RALPH: But I was -- hey, I was really bullied when I was little, and they used to make fun of my nose all the time, they used to make fun of my mouth and call me level lips, and even when it was black kids doing it to me, it never felt good. I don`t like it.
I don`t like it when we make fun of folks, even when we make fun of ourselves. It doesn`t feel good.
PINSKY: Darren, 10 seconds.
KAVINOKY: It`s parody. Let`s not be so socially proper about this. It is clearly parody.
RALPH: I don`t know about all of that.
PINSKY: Let me agree with me. It was bad judgment on behalf of the doctor. The M.D. after his name should give him better judgment.
Next up, I`m going to continue to make rounds with a sports dad who pulled a Mike Tyson type maneuver. Stick around.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
PINSKY (voice-over): A father charged with biting a coach`s ear off. This is a parent? Russell Brand throws a cell phone and gets arrested. Those and more.
And later, I`m taking calls, your questions, my answers.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PINSKY (on-camera): Welcome back. Mother says, I am sorry, because - - get this -- she choked her baby, 11-month-old baby. I think it was six times, all this in Casey Anthony`s backyard of Orlando, Florida. We`re going to talk about that.
But first, an angry dad allegedly attacked a sixth grade basketball coach after his son`s team lost a game, then, ended up biting off a part of the opposing coach`s ear. Tonight, a judge ruled that that 34-year-old Timothy Forbes (ph) remain behind bars until trial. Here is the 911 call made by the injured coach`s wife.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: 911. What is your emergency?
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Holy Name School in Springfield.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Holy name school?
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Yes.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: What`s going on there, ma`am?
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: After a game, the opposite coach went after my husband who coaches, and he bit his ear off.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Who bit their finger off?
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Their ear, their ear. The other coach bit my husband`s ear, and it`s hanging.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
Joining us is a man known for his bow ties, he`s the author of the just released book, "Born to be Brad," Brad Goreski. There is the book. All right. Now, the rest of our panel remains. I still have Mark and Sheryl Lee with me. Brad, what`s your reaction?
BRAD GORESKI, AUTHOR, "BORN TO BE BRAD": Well, I think this is --
PINSKY: Can this be solved with fashion?
GORESKI: Almost everything can be.
PINSKY: That`s where I figured you were going to go, but I don`t think this is about how the opposing coach dressed.
GORESKI: It could have been.
PINSKY: No, it couldn`t have been.
PINSKY: It couldn`t have been.
GORESKI: I have never bitten anybody`s ear off for a bad fashion choice.
PINSKY: I`m glad to hear that, actually.
GORESKI: Yes. It`s a -- you know, I can see somebody getting angry, but you know, what gets somebody to the point where the thought of I`m going to bite your ear, and not that it would be hanging as the woman said in the 911 call.
PINSKY: To me, it is someone who`s involved in a violent encounter with somebody, and that`s just an expression of this overwhelming aggression.
GORESKI: Have you ever been to that point?
PINSKY: I`ve never bit somebody`s ear, even if they wore a plaid bow tie and a plaid shirt. That`s all I`m saying.
PINSKY: Let`s go to another story here. Alexis Feldman (ph), this is woman`s name, who allegedly tried to choke her baby. Audiotape revealed the child gasping for breath. Here is what happened on the sixth attempt. The child can be seen using its left hand to grab mom, left hand. It`s just too much to keep the hand away from the baby`s throat. Eventually, the little girl`s body went limp.
The medical machine she was connected to began to beep which alerted the nurses. The baby remains hospitalized tonight and is in protective custody, thank God. Now, Sheryl Lee, what -- I mean, how do we -- here we are again, talking about these extreme behaviors. How do I understand this?
SHERYL LEE RALPH, ACTRESS AND SINGER: You know something, when I looked at it, Dr. Drew, I was trying to really make good sense out of this, because from the reports, it seems as though as the child -- when the child was in the hospital, the woman was doing this repeatedly. And the child had been brought to the hospital repeatedly for different illnesses as if she was trying to make it seem like the child had something going on with it.
Then I wonder, you know, she`s obviously very young. I guess, she`s about 20 or so. You know, is there some reason where if you have a sickly child, maybe she was going to get more assistance for having a sickly child? Who knows, but who strangles an 11-month-old baby. Something`s wrong.
PINSKY: That`s right. Something wrong. You know, I get -- Mark, I`m going to you for a quick comment. You know, I hear this -- we hear these stories night after night. You and I got to know each other around Casey Anthony. It`s so hard to understand this kind of motivation, and I`m finding out more and more people in this country are impatient, you know, had enough of this.
This woman says she was sorry, but who cares? I mean, sorry no longer carries really any weight when people behave like this.
MARK EIGLARSH, CRIMINAL DEFENSE ATTORNEY: That`s correct. You know, you`re never going to stop it, unfortunately. People don`t want to hear that. As long as you have mental illness, you have drug addiction, you know, you`re going to have people who just -- and people have defects in character. They`re going to do horrible things to children. We need to make sure that they`re punished and or we prevent this from happening.
RALPH: But we also have to find that support within our community to help folks realize how to raise children, because more and more, you`re finding all of these young people who were not raised by anybody who had any way to teach them anything, and they don`t have anything to pass onto their children, and they`re just doing what was done to them.
PINSKY: Sheryl Lee, I think you`re onto something. Brad has a comment here.
GORESKI: But I think that we also know that strangling people isn`t a way to deal with frustration and --
PINSKY: Hold on, Brad. Slow down.
GORESKI: I`m dropping a bomb here.
PINSKY: You go to extremes.
GORESKI: I know.
PINSKY: Not just about plaid bow ties with you.
GORESKI: I just don`t think that, you know, -- I do believe that people need the necessary tools, but I do think that there`s also right and wrong, which is, you know, getting to a point where you strangle your child. There`s, obviously, something more mental happening.
RALPH: Folks don`t know what right and wrong is any more. You know, we`ve got an awful lot of domestic violence going on within homes across this country. There are children taking a beat down every day, and they think that it is love. So, when she strangles her child, her father, her mother, her big brother, somebody might have seen it and said this is how you kill.
EIGLARSH: Hold on -- yes. Do we have time?
PINSKY: Go ahead.
EIGLARSH: You know, we don`t advertise every time a plane lands safely, you know? We only hear about the crashes.
EIGLARSH: I don`t know that these types of incidents are indicative of human nature. I think that these are isolated incidents, thank God. We do have a problem on our hands, but I don`t know that I want to perceive society as this being the norm. I don`t think so.
PINSKY: No, it`s not the norm, Mark, but Sheryl Lee is onto something. Yes. And I think what she`s onto, it`s common enough that, you know, you and I, Mark, you said it`s defect of character, its substance abuse, all those things, I can understand. I can have a frame of reference to understand what makes a behavior like that, but it seems to be expanding out to where people are behaving like this even when we can`t hang it on a mental health issue.
PINSKY: I got to switch topics. I`ve got Russell Brand. I promoted that we would talk about him, so here it is. He threw a cell phone at a paparazzo. He`s arrested and charged with a felony. There he is. Now, he is identified as a sex addict. He is a recovering addict. Mark, you know, he`s misbehaving. Is that a problem in the spirit? We have future trouble coming here for Russell?
EIGLARSH: Yes. I think that he needs to be careful, he needs to make sure that he`s going to his meetings, whatever meetings he thinks is appropriate to make sure that he`s on the right spiritual path. Maybe this is indicative of him not being on that path, needs to get back on it.
PINSKY: Yes. Brad, that`s my concern. You see somebody with history of addiction acting out, then I start to worry about them.
GORESKI: Well, I`ve been sober for ten years.
PINSKY: Good for you.
GORESKI: Thank you. And I believe that this is definitely a case of somebody who needs to, whether its meetings he`s going to or checking in with a therapist, but, you know, when you get to that point where you don`t have that filter and you don`t know when to stop and you start acting out - -
PINSKY: And you know what happens, and I`ve heard him talking, it seems like he`s being a little cavalier about sexual addiction. That`s all part of one`s spirit, upon being health. If that`s out of line, the whole thing is out of line. You can`t say, oh, I`m just not a cocaine addict or I`m not this addict, but I have a little trouble over here with eating or with sex, or whatever, not OK.
GORESKI: Whatever addiction you may have, if you`re off of that path of recovery and off of the path of treating that addiction, you`re going to act this way.
PINSKY: Mark --
EIGLARSH: We have people don`t understand. It`s not about doing cocaine or doing alcohol or sticking your finger down your throat, it`s about the hole in the soul. There`s something that causes somebody to act that way, and if you don`t deal with the underlying issue, it will come out in other ways.
GORESKI: I think also, too, though, if you have people in your face all the time, though, like following you around, watching your every move, too, that other layer is something else.
PINSKY: The fame.
GORESKI: Yes, exactly. That can trigger all of those things.
PINSKY: Are you noticing something in your own recovery when it comes to doing all of this kind of stuff?
GORESKI: No, I feel really good. I just put on green jackets and shirts that match my bow tie and my glasses and go about my day.
PINSKY: Careful. If you think those match, I think we got to talk after the show.
PINSKY: Sheryl Lee, any last comment. I`ve got about 20 seconds.
RALPH: Listen, I think he was just upset that people are always in his face saying you slept around on Katy Perry. Russell, darling, what`s wrong with you? Look at you.
EIGLARSH: Well, good point.
PINSKY: I know. I know. I know. It`s like huh. Something is really wrong. Thank you to my panel. Thanks for joining us with this, making the rounds, Sheryl Lee, Mark, and Brad, appreciate you guys.
"On-Call" is next. I`m going to take your questions, try to get some answers. A Super Bowl winning quarterback is a question for me. I`m looking forward -- he`s got the same name as me, evidently. I can`t imagine who that would be. I`ll do my best to answer his question and yours. Stay with us.
PINSKY: It is time for "On-Call." And my first question comes from Drew Brees, quarterback for the New Orleans Saints. Drew has a new ad campaign for Dick`s Sporting Goods. All right, Drew, here we go. Mano- mano, what`s up?
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
DREW BREES, QUARTERBACK, NEW ORLEANS SAINTS: Hey, Dr. Drew. You and I both know that every one of us has those special moments, those untouchable moments in life that we always look back and cherish upon, and certainly, I know myself as a parent and all the parents out there want the best for their kids.
So, my question to you is from one Drew to another is how do we get kids off the sofa and get them moving and motivated?
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PINSKY: Well, I mean, Drew, I think this is a reasonable question. I have two answers to that. One is just the fact that you`re thinking that way will get your kids off the couch. I mean, look, you get them involved in sports, you get them involved in outdoor activities, you can get them off the couch. You`re in charge in your household. You can get them off the couch.
But, I got to tell you something. I think, I actually believe, and somewhat a minority opinion at this point in time, it`s OK for them to hang out and play a little videogame. I mean, that`s their future. That`s their world, the electronic world they`re entering into. And it`s balance. It`s like everything else.
It`s just when they get stuck doing that, and they get addicted. I`ve seen kids stay, you know, on the couch for weeks at a time and that is very concerning. And I will give you one little bit of information, which is when kids get addicted to these online video games or these electronic games, it`s usually a second psychiatric problem motivating it, like depression or something that they`re just trying to escape those feelings.
So, that is one of the addictions where if you get them, they`re like problem treated (ph), the behavior does tend to get better.
Mary in Virginia, you`ve got a question about the so-called ear biting incident. What`s going on there?
MARY, VIRGINIA: Yes. Hi, Dr. Drew.
MARY: This dad is a real immature man who cannot control his impulses.
PINSKY: Hold on now. Have you met him?
MARY: No. But, I mean, anyone who does something like that --
PINSKY: I don`t know about immature. I just know violent, right? I mean, like super violent.
MARY: Anger management. Yes.
PINSKY: It sounds to me like somebody on steroids or something, like super human kind of weird reaction. I mean, does it seem like a normal human reaction to you?
MARY: Absolutely not.
MARY: He`s setting a bad example for his son by expressing his negative emotions.
PINSKY: Hold on, slow down. It`s a bad example to fight and bite someone`s ear off? That`s bad example? That`s not sportsman like?
PINSKY: Yes. Listen, I think he set a bad example for his community. Everyone around him should be upset. You know, we all focus in on that little town. He doesn`t represent the town even. I mean, this is a guy that is an outlier. He`s in jail. The legal system is doing what it`s supposed to do. Have you -- where you from?
MARY: I`m from Virginia, Northern Virginia.
PINSKY: Northern Virginia. And do you experience much violence in kids sports?
MARY: Oh, yes. In Northern Virginia, we have a lot of violence. In fact, Arlington County, the biggest problem there is drug abuse and violence.
PINSKY: Well, of course. Well, the drug abuse and the violence goes hand in hand. But I`m wondering about like the soccer dads and dads on the baseball diamond. Do you see that kind of misbehavior?
MARY: I live in the suburbs, so, no, I don`t see that much of that.
PINSKY: Good. All right, good. I actually pulled my kids out of soccer when they were about nine years old and put them in tackle football, because the dads were misbehaving so badly, so egregiously. They were behaving so outrage usually, I put the kids in tackle football. It was much more gentlemanly. Thanks for your call, my dear.
Catherine in Fort Worth, you`ve been holding. You`ve got a question about, what is it?
CATHERINE, FORT WORTH: About the female ex-police officer with the 15-year-old.
PINSKY: Oh, yes. Oh, yes. Can you believe that one?
CATHERINE: I don`t understand. Is there something about Florida that makes that a haven for abusing children?
PINSKY: You know, listen, I`m laughing but it is no laughing matter. When I did the "Love Line" with Adam Corolla back in the day, we used to have a game. We`d call it Germany or Florida. When something really nasty was happening, all right, hold on, is it Germany or Florida? No offense, Florida.
It just happened to be either Germany or Florida almost always. Hey, do you think the fact that this was a male, again, it was female cop adult, sexually abusing a male student, do you think that made people -- because, apparently, the community was aware of this. Do you think that made people react differently?
CATHERINE: It may have. It shouldn`t make a difference.
CATHERINE: You know, they say it takes a village to raise a child. Well, in this case, with parents and teachers knowing about it, the village turned their backs.
PINSKY: Yes. But listen, but listen, how do we get people to understand that, because I know as a physician, I see these kids later, and the young males end up in desperate straits. They end up with more addiction, more criminal behavior, more personality, more psychiatric problems.
Now, the really interesting question here is, do these perpetrators like this woman who had sex with this teenager select kids who are at risk, and by doing so, just make something worse that already wasn`t going to go so well or do they actually cause it.
CATHERINE: I think they do.
PINSKY: You think they pick kids who are vulnerable.
CATHERINE: I think they do. And you know, because they also say, though, that, you know, males are different from females. Their mentality is different.
PINSKY: It`s different, but they`re still kids. They`re still children. Their brains are still forming.
CATHERINE: They`re still children and, you know, I don`t know, it`s crazy. I don`t understand why someone wants to be with a child.
PINSKY: Where are you calling from?
CATHERINE: Fort Worth.
PINSKY: Well, that`s -- that I can`t go my head around, but where are you calling from?
CATHERINE: I`m calling from Fort Worth.
PINSKY: Forth Worth. And have you seen stuff like this go on where you are?
CATHERINE: No, well, when I was a child, I heard about a boy scout leader molesting somebody that I knew.
PINSKY: Oh, my God.
CATHERINE: But not here lately. I mean --
PINSKY: So, this one, you felt this one in your gut. You felt it.
PINSKY: Yes, yes. Listen. Here`s the good news. We`re having this conversation. People are more aware of this nonsense. And back then when you were a kid, people were -- there was a very bizarre sort of period of history where people would say, hey, whatever you`re into, man, who are we to judge. Guess what, we can. We can. Thanks for the call.
Janet asked this on Facebook. "Does alcohol really damage every organ in the body?" That is actually a great, great question. You know, people love to breakdown drugs and alcohol into good drugs and bad drugs. Alcohol and cigarettes, good drugs, they`re legal. Marijuana, cocaine, bad drugs, they`re illegal.
One thing people don`t realize is that alcohol is the one drug, and let`s make no mistake about it, it`s a food but it`s a drug that can damage almost every organ in your body. It can increase the risk of cancer of the esophagus, the colon, the -- I mean, it causes liver disease, the mouth, the throat can cause cancers there.
It, obviously, injures the brain, actually kind of dissolves the brain, has a chronic brain injury associated with. And it`s a one drug that withdrawal from which can be fatal. DTs, potentially fatal. So, that is really a great, great question.
Remember that, when you take -- make alcohol just sort of a -- you think lightly of alcohol as a good drug, but these other drugs are bad. More of your questions and comments. I`m going to keep it going, and then, after a little break here, we`ve got some more to come. So, stay with us. After this.
PINSKY: We are back with your questions. Go up to Dave in California. What`s going on?
DAVE, CALIFORNIA: Hi, Dr. Drew. How are you?
PINSKY: Dave, I`m good.
DAVE: First time calling. Love your show, though.
PINSKY: Thank you.
DAVE: I just have a question now. My girlfriend and I have been seeing each other about a year and a half now.
PINSKY: OK. How old are you?
DAVE: We`re both in our mid-30s actually.
PINSKY: OK. Right.
DAVE: And she started pressure to have children, and it`s something that, you know, I`m just starting to get in a place that I like to be. So, it`s not something that I want do at this point in time.
PINSKY: But have you told her that?
DAVE: I have, and she says that, you know, I don`t want to grow up, and I`m afraid of things.
PINSKY: No, no, no, no, no.
DAVE: I don`t want to get (ph) pressured, you know?
PINSKY: No, Dave, that`s her being defensive. Here is what she hears you say when you said I don`t want to have kids. She hears, I don`t want to have kids with you, meaning her.
PINSKY: And that is deeply wounding. And if you don`t prepare for that and help her with that, it`s going to be bad times, my friend. You know, you really have to -- that`s a tender issue for people. You know, it`s a deep part of who she sees of herself as a woman if she`s someone who wants to have kids.
And when you say, I`m just not ready for that yet. That`s a knife, man. And so, please deal with those tender feelings tenderly. You`re perfectly entitled to your feelings, and God knows people have kids before they`re ready, I don`t advocate that, but just be careful of her feelings. OK?
DAVE: Thanks, Dr. Drew. Good advice.
PINSKY: All right, my friend. All right. Good luck.
Steve in California. What`s going on there, Steve?
STEVE, CALIFORNIA: Oh, Dr. Drew, I am a huge fan, I got to tell you.
PINSKY: Thank you, Steve. What`s up?
STEVE: I was just wondering. Has anybody ever been so distressed calling on your show or in your practice that you`ve actually had to talk them out of suicide?
PINSKY: Many times. Now, there are two different things. One is in my professional practice versus, say, on the radio program. When somebody calls in a radio program and is thinking about suicide, I try not to deal with it on the air, honestly. And I deal with it the same way I deal with it in my professional practice, which is I deal with it immediately, swift and sure.
This is an important message for anybody out there that hears anybody, even having any ideation about suicide. If they`re talking about it, thinking about it, that is a medical emergency. A certain percentage of people with depression will kill themselves. That means depression is a potentially fatal illness.
People forget that. So, when they begin thinking about suicide, that mean the depression is serious enough that they`re having that symptom, and that somebody needs immediate attention, medical attention. If they`re imminent, you call the cops, you get them involved. If you can get them to a hospital, get them to a hospital.
If you can get them to a doctor, you get them to a doctor, but you do not waste time, you do not pass go. You take care of it immediately, swift and sure. Thank you, Steve.
Kristin asked, "Is it possible to abuse alcohol without being addicted, and when do you know if you have crossed the line?" Really another important question there. Listen, almost everybody in this country abuses alcohol. And I mean, it`s just so common. I mean, there`s use and then there`s abuse. And we could argue, you know, what`s abuse and what`s use.
Let`s say everybody uses it. Abusing it means you have consequences from it, but addiction is when you have a family history, meaning there`s some evidence of genetic basis, and you have ongoing use despite consequences. A great consequence that let you know you have a problem, blacking out, driving under the influence, a legal problem, or a medical problem, doctor tells you there`s an issue here.
So, if you have a family history and you`re continuing to use despite consequences, like serious consequences in your relationships, your health, your finances, your legal status, then you have this thing we call alcoholism, and then you need treatment. That is something likely to progress.
You got to be very cautious about it. Anyone with family history of alcoholism should be really cautious about relationship with substances and alcohol.
Thanks for the great questions. Thank you all for watching tonight. I will see you next time.