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NANCY GRACE

Jodi Arias`s Private Journals

Aired April 22, 2013 - 20:00   ET

THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.


NANCY GRACE, HOST: Tonight, Jodi Arias in her own words before and after killing Travis Alexander, inside Arias`s own personal handwritten journals, many entries even the jury has never seen. No doubt Jodi Arias`s testimony and her police interrogation tapes were bizarre. Well, tonight, fasten your seatbelt because things are getting bumpy.

We know Arias finally admits to police she killed Travis Alexander. But just after stabbing him 29 times and shooting him, Arias was not admitting anything to anybody, not even to herself.

(BEGIN AUDIO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: "I have so much to thank you for. I am grateful that I ceased (ph) the opportunity to do so on so many occasions, being aware that you were a words of affirmation kind of guy. Thank you for all you`ve done for me. Thank you for opening your home to me more times than I could count. My refrigerator is your refrigerator."

"Thank you for all of the times you called me up in the early evening and told me to go outside and look at the sunset. Travis, this can`t really be real. I know you hated that kind of thinking. After we broke up, I stopped wearing the CTR (ph) ring that you gave me, but it`s back on my finger now."

"I didn`t have the slightest clue that when we met at the Rain Forest Cafe, you`d have such a lasting and profound impact on my life. It seems fitting that we should meet at the Rain Forest Cafe, being the environmentally forward people that we are. You care so much about this planet, always encouraging us to take care of it, reminding us of its role in God`s eternal plan. Thank you for believing my skills as a photographer and an artist."

"We called each other and talked until it was light out. It actually wasn`t really talking -- well, dirty talk, I guess you could say. I`m just as naughty as he is, more in fact. I often feel guilty, but it`s the guiltiest pleasure I`ve known since I have discovered Valrhona chocolate. Anyway, I have the perfect spot in the woods for us up in Greenhorn. It`s been about seven-and-a-half years since I`ve been there, but it`s secluded and perfect for getting down."

"He has a video camera now. I can`t believe we`re still planning this. Part of me is overcome with anticipation, and part of me is reserved and waiting to step up and be a good girl. But he`s very persuasive, in a good way."

"So again, it was just one of his cycles. I`ve somehow managed to become his whipping girl and we`re both addicted to it. It`s the same pattern as always. He gets pissed, goes off on me, feels bad. We make up. Things are mellow for a few days, and then the cycle begins again. I`ve learned that it`s better to just let it run its course."

"Yes, Travis. You`re right, Travis. Whatever you say, Travis. As long as I`m not patronizing, he goes right through it and then ends up being apologetic and sweet talking afterward, and we end up having makeup sex, or in this case, phone sex. We`re crazy being addicted to this cycle."

"We`ve explored about 90 percent of all our fantasies. We`ve yet to pull over on the freeway and do it on the hood of the car in the middle of the day. I seriously doubt that will ever happen. We haven`t done the mile high yet and probably never will, and we`ve yet to act out the Little Red Riding Hood spin (ph) in the woods, which as of last night is still scheduled to happen."

"I love Travis and always will. We`re just different. His fiery temper doesn`t mix with my tendency to cry at the drop of a hat over spilled milk or whatever."

"Anyway, huge digression. So mum`s the word on Mr. Ryan Burns, although Travis jokingly insinuated that I was certainly making a trip out to Utah for a reason. He said, Uh-huh, yes, sure, I bet, et cetera."

OK, so we finally cracked. I called and left Travis a voicemail, and he called back. He was acting very angry at first. He said, Check your e- mail. So I did, but there wasn`t anything from him. So I checked my Facebook, and there was a really long, ridiculous e-mail from him just being his classic rude. We also chatted on Gmail, more rude. He accused me again of slashing his tires, which, of course, is not true."

"Moving has certainly helped me morally. I don`t know if it has him or if he`s found a replacement booty call. For his sake, I hope he hasn`t, not because it would be a replacement but because it is not spiritually productive."

"I am mortified that my phone was stolen. It had a hugely scandalous text message from him, 10 pages that he sent last week. It would make a steamy romance novel sound like a script from a G-rated Disney movie. I also had one or two recorded conversations that were equally as scandalous. I never did figure out how to play those back for him."

(END AUDIO CLIP)

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

JENNIFER WILMOTT, ARIAS`S DEFENSE ATTORNEY: (INAUDIBLE) of 2007, is there -- after your review of this journal writing, what is your impression with regard to what Ms. Arias is writing about?

ALYCE LAVIOLETTE, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE EXPERT: She`s writing about her experience of Mr. Alexander and a testimony that he gave regarding eternal families, regarding his own father, and her -- just her admiration of him and what it meant to her to have someone who was so strong and so usually tough and jovial, to be so in touch with his heart, and that it touched her deeply and that she realized one of the reasons that she was so deeply in love with him.

WILMOTT: And does she talk about the two of them in a spiritual sense?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes. She talks about them, about feeling very close to him spiritually, that this touched her a lot and then once again connected them in a spiritual way.

WILMOTT: With regard to this particular journal, does she talk about how she loves him, but then that it`s not always what she wishes?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes. Clearly, she talks about having two very separate experiences with him, and one that he makes her sick and one that he makes her happy, one that he makes her sad and one that he makes her miserable, one where she feels uplifted and one where she feels -- and feels beautiful. So she`s back and forth. She`s got the best and the worst, is what it seems like.

WILMOTT: All right. And then does she talk about -- does she say that, All in all, I shouldn`t be wording it as if he makes me feel those things, right?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes. That`s part of the laws of attraction, as well.

WILMOTT: OK. And she goes on to say it all originates from within.

LAVIOLETTE: Yes.

WILMOTT: So -- and you said that`s part of the law of attraction?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes, that she would have the power to -- that she doesn`t have to feel bad if she thinks in a more positive way.

WILMOTT: OK.

LAVIOLETTE: If she thinks more positively, if she acts more positively, that she`ll feel more positively, despite what`s going on.

JUAN MARTINEZ, PROSECUTOR: Did you have a problem understanding the question? Tell me what negative thing the defendant wrote about herself in those journals. That was my question.

LAVIOLETTE: Would you show me what you`re referring to?

MARTINEZ: No. You`re the one that just told us that you read journals before you came here into court, didn`t you.

LAVIOLETTE: I did.

MARTINEZ: And you spent many hours, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes, I did.

MARTINEZ: And you charged $250 an hour to read them, right?

LAVIOLETTE: It`s the standard fee, Mr. Martinez.

MARTINEZ: Am I asking about the standard fee?

LAVIOLETTE: Apparently not.

MARTINEZ: And ma`am, in those journals, the ones that you read, the ones that you can remember, can you think of anything negative that the defendant said about herself in those journals, anything?

LAVIOLETTE: She talked about being depressed. She talked about -- and I -- there are -- there are numerous places where she talks about feeling bad about herself in places not just in the journal...

MARTINEZ: I`m talking about the journals, ma`am. Remember, that`s what we are talking about, just the journals.

LAVIOLETTE: I read the journals.

MARTINEZ: Right. What else...

LAVIOLETTE: I read the journals, and you would have to show me specifically what you`re talking about. I don`t know what part of the journals you`re talking about. And frankly, I read pages and pages of journals, Mr. Martinez.

MARTINEZ: One of the things that you told us earlier was that you have a bachelor`s degree, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: No, I have a master`s degree.

MARTINEZ: Well, before that, you had to have a bachelor`s degree, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes, I did.

MARTINEZ: What year did you get your bachelor`s degree?

LAVIOLETTE: 1969.

MARTINEZ: And then after that, you did get a master`s degree, right?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes, I did.

MARTINEZ: And what year was that?

LAVIOLETTE: 1980.

MARTINEZ: So there was a span of time between the bachelor`s and the master`s degree, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes, there was.

MARTINEZ: And ma`am, one of the things that you didn`t tell us was that after the master`s degree, you did not continue in your studies, did you.

LAVIOLETTE: I`m not sure what you mean.

MARTINEZ: You did not obtain a Ph.D., did you.

LAVIOLETTE: No, but I continued in studies.

MARTINEZ: So did -- so is it true that you did obtain a Ph.D., then?

LAVIOLETTE: No, I continued in my studies. I took classes and I took -- I take CEUs (ph) every year.

MARTINEZ: So the answer is no, you do not have a Ph.D., correct?

LAVIOLETTE: No, I don`t have a Ph.D.

MARTINEZ: And since you don`t have a Ph.D., ma`am, There are certain restrictions that you -- that are placed on you that are not placed on an individual with a Ph.D., correct?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes.

MARTINEZ: For example, you cannot administer any tests, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: I don`t administer tests.

MARTINEZ: The answer is no, then, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes.

MARTINEZ: And the other thing that you can`t do is you can`t read any psychological tests, either, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: I can`t read any psychological tests?

MARTINEZ: In other words, you may have some training in what you do, but in terms of looking at a psychological test, you may have some idea, but you have to rely on others that have more schooling and training than you to be able to tell you what the results are of a particular test, right?

LAVIOLETTE: I would tell you that we have different training. And in terms of psychological tests, I would not be doing psychological tests. In terms of other things, I might have more training than someone with a Ph.D.

MARTINEZ: I`m not asking about other areas. I`m talking about psychological tests. Do we understand each other?

LAVIOLETTE: We definitely understand each other.

MARTINEZ: With regard to the psychological testing, it`s true that you do not have the expertise to be able to engage, if you will, in the reading of tests, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: Correct.

MARTINEZ: And you can`t score tests, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: Correct.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GRACE: The defense claims Jodi Arias won`t write negative comments in her own journal because she tries to be positive and follow along the book "The Secret." Well, up next, we`ve got a secret to reveal ourselves, and it`s from Jodi Arias`s private journal.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GRACE: Jodi Arias claims she`s the victim, a victim of abuse at the hands of the man she loved and killed, Travis Alexander. So why didn`t another single soul on earth know about this abuse? Well, the defense says Arias won`t say anything negative and always remains positive. But let me tell you that`s not what her own words reveal in her private journals, many of these entries even the jury will never see.

(BEGIN AUDIO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: "One thing is for sure, I do love him. I don`t think he feels quite the same, unfortunately. Sometimes, I think I get a feeling or vibe coming off of him that feels like it, but he`s never said anything. If he did just say it, I`d be so happy. I think it would elevate our relationship to a better, higher level. He would certainly put me on cloud nine and alleviate silly insecurities and occasional uncertainties I have about him. Those things are natural, I guess."

"Recently, I`ve gotten a few suspicious feelings, but he assures me everything is OK and I`m worrying over nothing. I believe him. Plus, I`d rather spend little bit of time worrying over nothing than worrying over something."

"Bottom line is he is wonderful. I am so grateful that we`ve attracted each other into our lives. I hope we continue to share the same path. At this rate, we will. What I think is neat is that I feel lucky to have him in my life, but he says he`s lucky. How cool is that?"

"What a great guy. T-Dog (ph) is taking me to the airport tonight. I will miss him, as always, even more so when we are having fun together. I love him. I love life. I love the gospel. I love the church. I love Jesus Christ. I love Heavenly Father. I am grateful for the countless and infinite blessings I`ve been given and will continue to receive. As ever and always, JAA."

"It just feels like he hasn`t called me in too long. I hear him singing. I hear him laughing."

"Norma Sarvey (ph), Mums or Mum-Mum, got her flowers today. I sent 20 white irises. Travis always told me she liked the name Iris for a girl. That and Hinkley (ph), Reagan or Megan. I`ll take Iris, thank you very much. He likes Ivan for a boy`s name. If I ever have a son, I`ll name him Alexander."

"I miss Travis more than words can say. It`s weird. I was getting so used to communicating less frequently with him, finally building up other areas of my life. But his passing has brought up so many things, so many old feelings. It almost feels like I broke up with him again and thus the separation. I don`t know. I just don`t know. This can`t really be real."

(END AUDIO CLIP)

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

WILMOTT: Do you recall that journal writing?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes, I do.

WILMOTT: All right, why don`t you tell us the -- based on your impressions of reading through that journal, this particular entry, what`s your impression of what it -- what is it about?

LAVIOLETTE: It`s about a time that they go out for karaoke and Ms. Arias sings "My Guy" for Mr. Alexander and how much he appreciates it and how he praises her for her singing ability.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: (INAUDIBLE)

WILMOTT: Just tell us your impressions of what it`s about.

LAVIOLETTE: It`s about -- it`s about her singing ability and her using that singing ability to make an impression on Mr. Alexander, and that it does.

WILMOTT: All right. And is this something where -- is she writing about how good she feels with him?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes, about how special he makes her...

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: (INAUDIBLE)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Sustained.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GRACE: Next, Jodi Arias pretends to seek an answer to the mystery who killed Travis Alexander. But of course, she already knows.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GRACE: It`s time again for the blame game, pointing the finger. We all know Jodi Arias kills Travis, but you wouldn`t know it from reading her own personal diary, her journal. So why was she lying to herself? Or was she laying a trap for police to find, to cover her own tracks?

(BEGIN AUDIO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: "I spoke with Ryan on the phone last night, but we didn`t talk much. He was very sleepy, although we stayed on the line for a good three hours. He made me even more aware that people are dropping my name as possibly having something to do with Travis`s death."

"At first, it didn`t bother me. I know what is true. But it seems now to really be poisoning the environment in Utah and Socal. I`m saddened by it because I love my PPL (ph) family very much. I also can`t help but wonder if this is part of my repentance process, or Heavenly Father withdrawing his blessing because of the immoral way I acted with Travis. It makes me wonder what Travis is going through as a result of our behavior, as well."

"That was the last place on the list that I saw with Travis. My heart aches so bad. Yes, I want to know who and I want to know why, but there`s a part of me that realizes that even if that person or persons are found, it won`t bring Travis back."

(END AUDIO CLIP)

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

WILMOTT: What is the subject matter of this journal entry such that it was important to your ultimate opinion?

LAVIOLETTE: The subject matter was hiding, hiding your relationship, which became important, and preserving an image of your sexual purity. It was a journal entry that talked about Ms. Arias, Jodi, picking Mr. Alexander up from the airport to visit his grandmother, who was ill, and her sneaking back into the house after his grandmother was asleep and then leaving the house prior to his grandmother being awake.

WILMOTT: And the sneaking in and leaving prior to his grandmother being awake, was that at Mr. Alexander`s request?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes, it was.

WILMOTT: So it wasn`t anything that -- when you say "sneaking," it was anything that Ms. Arias did to try -- for herself to try and be sneaky, right?

LAVIOLETTE: No. It was -- the alarm was set so that she would be able to leave.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GRACE: Up next, Jodi Arias puts pen to paper to reveal her feelings she has for the man she ends up killing, the man she loved. Well, it`s a very different picture than the one she paints in court.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GRACE: Tonight, inside the twisted mind of Jodi Arias. It`s revealed in her personal journal entries. Even the jury hasn`t heard these. While the defense portrays Travis as an abusive monster, that`s a far cry from what Jodi Arias actually writes about her lover, the lover that she kills.

(BEGIN AUDIO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: "This horrendous, the most awful thing I`ve ever had to deal with. I am in total shock right now. It hasn`t fully hit me. This can`t be real. This just can`t be happening. I spoke with Bishop Layton (ph). He confirmed that Travis is dead! What happened? Travis, what is this?

Yesterday marked one year since I broke up with Travis. If it weren`t for his abrupt and tragic passing, I might be filled with a sense of growth, progression and independence, but my moving on has actually been somewhat hindered as I have not even begun to stop mourning.

This is serious business. This isn`t a benign rumor about some insignificant and trivial little thing I may have done. We are talking about death, a murder, a homicide. It is horrific enough in itself to know that such a thing occurred, that someone could harm Travis.

I don`t understand it. And it`s not secret that he and I had problems and arguments in between periods of love, kindness, generosity and selflessness, but such a rollercoaster of a relationship still could not warrant a penalty of death -- not for him, nor for me. And in considering the little amount of details known about how he died, whatever he could have done or whoever he could have pissed off still could not have possibly warranted the way in which he was killed.

I had a dream last night that two people were charged in the case of Travis Alexander. One person was charged with murder and one was charged with conspiracy. The one charged with murder was in custody, and the one charged with conspiracy was not yet arrested on some contingency having to do with legal matters in some jurisdiction, like FBI or something. I was riding in someone`s yellow truck when I got the call. It was raining outside.

Anyway, keep praying.

Time for more irony. Today, I will be driving to Sacramento to get on the plane to Ontario, where I will attend Travis`s funeral and burial. The irony? Today is the summer solstice. Today is the brightest and longest day of the year. Yet it is the darkest.

Last night I had a good talk with Ryan Burns. He is a great guy. I`d like to see him again soon, so hopefully.

Work was hard today. I thought a lot about Travis. I have come down hard on myself for missing his funeral. I know he probably wouldn`t mind, although truthfully I can hear the T-Dogg now. Wow, wow that hurts. I miss his ranting. I can`t believe all of this still.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

LAVIOLETTE: I can`t review Mr. Alexander, although I read what he wrote about his life and I read some things in his journal, and I read an e-mail from his sister. So I really tried to look not only at Ms. Arias` perspective, but also at the perspective or the things that Mr. Alexander wrote that I had opportunity to read.

MARTINEZ: Are you done with your answer?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes, I am.

MARTINEZ: Now answer my question. Haven`t you just illustrated for us one of the flaws in just relying on what somebody has written?

LAVIOLETTE: That a name can be different?

MARTINEZ: No, that people can write something by mistake. You were imputing that mistake to Mr. Alexander, weren`t you?

LAVIOLETTE: One of them made a mistake.

MARTINEZ: Well, no, ma`am, didn`t you just say to me earlier, oh, well, Mr. Alexander could have made a mistake. Right?

LAVIOLETTE: I said he could have.

MARTINEZ: Right. So the mistake, if there is one, according to you, it was Mr. Alexander`s. It wasn`t the defendant`s, right?

LAVIOLETTE: No, I said he could have made a mistake.

MARTINEZ: Right.

LAVIOLETTE: I don`t know if her name was Maria or Marie or Michelle, but the name of somebody is not nearly as important to me as the rest of it. I don`t know why that name is so important to you, frankly.

MARTINEZ: Ma`am, would you admonish the witness about responses like that?

(CROSSTALK)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Don`t volunteer information. You may continue.

MARTINEZ: Ma`am, my question to you is not about the names. It is just illustrative. My question to you is, isn`t it true that just relying on the written word is the situation, as you have illustrated, that could create mistakes? Right?

LAVIOLETTE: If you only rely on one written word.

MARTINEZ: Even if you rely on 200 different items, isn`t it true that mistakes can be made in the writing, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes.

MARTINEZ: With regards to that entry, if you found that it was incomplete and didn`t include the reason for the fight, wouldn`t that be important to note?

LAVIOLETTE: It doesn`t include the reason for the fight.

MARTINEZ: I know it doesn`t. But what if -- wouldn`t that indicate that it is incomplete because it doesn`t indicate the reason for the fight?

LAVIOLETTE: It`s just a journal entry.

MARTINEZ: And that journal entry means nothing to you, does it? Or it does?

LAVIOLETTE: A stand-alone journal entry doesn`t mean as much to me as when I look at the big picture.

MARTINEZ: I`m just talking about this -- I understand what you are saying.

LAVIOLETTE: It is incomplete, I will agree with that. There is not any description of the fight or anything.

MARTINEZ: So if it is incomplete with regard to that, and you are relying on it, it would appear that you are relying on something that is incomplete, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: I`m not sure that you`re looking at how I rely on things.

MARTINEZ: Well, you read it, right?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes, I did.

MARTINEZ: You put it into your brain, this brain that you use to go through this continuum of aggression, right?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Objection. Argumentative.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Overruled.

MARTINEZ: Right?

LAVIOLETTE: That I?

MARTINEZ: You put that information, after reading it, assimilated it into your brain, and then made a decision based on this continuum of aggression that you talk about, right? That is part of what you did with regard to that, right?

LAVIOLETTE: I told you the way I used the continuum. So I`m not putting it into the continuum. I`m putting it into the big barrel of information that I`ve gotten.

MARTINEZ: All right, so you took -- you took this entry and you put it into this big barrel of information that you have. Right?

LAVIOLETTE: Correct.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GRACE: Up next, Jodi Arias tells Travis Alexander she is calling it quits, kind of, sort of.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GRACE: Jodi Arias` personal journal. Arias tells Travis she is leaving him, but it is not for the reason the defense would have you think.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I haven`t written in days. There are so many thoughts that stream through my mind, and I think, hmm, I should write that in my journal. Things are still hitting home in a big way. I can`t stop picturing his neighborhood, his belongings. He was a fighter. He was so tough. How could anyone overpower such a machine? I want answers, too. The only reason I`m not throwing anyone`s name under the bus is because I really don`t know who could be responsible for this. It is wild. At times it still doesn`t even seem real. I`m no lady of justice, but I just know that there is nothing he could have possibly done to deserve what happened to him.

I was honestly contemplating suicide this afternoon. How weak and pathetic I can be at times. What scares me a little is that although the cloud has lifted, I feel that it is definitely temporary. I am scared for it to come back. But is there really nothing to fear but fear itself? Am I really all that powerful? Where does my faith run off to during the dark times? For it is during those dark times that I could really use it most, yet it escapes me. And when there is no faith, there is no hope. And when there is no hope, there is naught but despair. And when naught but despair takes over, I want nothing more than to end it all.

This may very well be enough to send be back down to suicide levels. Thoughts of such have been permeating my mind ceaselessly. I smile to others, and at times it seems fine, but inside I just want to end it all.

I know that`s not what Travis would want. It is not what anyone would want, but it is not their life. It`s mine, and I care not for it at this moment in time.

I know I shouldn`t be so ungrateful, but the loss of my dear friend brings pain that is too much to bear. Who? Why? How? But mostly why? It seems my eyes will never dry up.

I`m for the Ten Commandments. I`m for thou shall not kill. But is it wrong to want the perpetrator to get the needle? Perhaps. Is it wrong to want to end my own life? Depression is no joke, as it has revealed no sense of humor. Life at least has that. But I am broken, utterly broken.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

MARTINEZ: With regard to that entry, if you found that it was incomplete and didn`t include the reason for the fight, wouldn`t that be important to note?

LAVIOLETTE: It doesn`t include the reason for the fight.

MARTINEZ: I know it doesn`t. But what if -- wouldn`t that indicate that it is incomplete because it doesn`t indicate the reason for the fight?

LAVIOLETTE: It`s just a journal entry.

MARTINEZ: And that journal entry means nothing to you, does it? Or it does?

LAVIOLETTE: A stand-alone journal entry doesn`t mean as much to me as when I am looking at the big picture.

MARTINEZ: I am just talking about this one, and I understand what you are saying.

LAVIOLETTE: It is incomplete. I will agree with that. There is not any description of the fight or anything.

MARTINEZ: So if it is incomplete with regard to that, and you are relying on it, it would appear that you are relying on something that is incomplete, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: I`m not sure that you`re looking at how I rely on things.

MARTINEZ: Well, you read it, right?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes, I did.

MARTINEZ: You put it into your brain, this brain that you use to go through this continuum of aggression, right?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Objection. Argumentative.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Overruled.

MARTINEZ: Right?

LAVIOLETTE: That I --

MARTINEZ: You put that information, after reading it, assimilated it into your brain, and then made a decision based on this continuum of aggression that you talk about, right? That is part of what you did with regard to that, right?

LAVIOLETTE: I told you the way I used the continuum. So I`m not putting it into the continuum. I`m putting it into the big --

MARTINEZ: So you --

LAVIOLETTE: Big barrel of information that I have gotten.

MARTINEZ: So you took this entry and you put it into this big barrel of information that you have, right?

LAVIOLETTE: Correct.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: June of 2007, is there -- after your review of this journal writing, what is your impression with regard to what Ms. Arias is writing about?

LAVIOLETTE: She is writing about her experience of Mr. Alexander in a testimony that he gave regarding eternal families, regarding his own father, and her, just her admiration of him and what it meant to her to have someone who was so strong and so usually tough and jovial, to be so in touch with his heart, and that it touched her deeply, and that she realized one of the reasons that she was so deeply in love with him.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: And does she talk about the two of them in a spiritual sense?

LAVIOLETTE: Yes. She talks about them, about feeling very close to him spiritually, that this touched her a lot, and that once again connected them in a spiritual way.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GRACE: Jodi Arias claims Travis Alexander repeatedly, brutally attacked her. Something I think would show up in a private journal of hers. Up next, a look at what she actually wrote on those very days she claims Travis attacked her.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GRACE: Usually you put your most personal, your most private thoughts, your feelings, into a private journal. So what did Jodi Arias write on the day she claims Travis Alexander attacked and beat her brutally? The answer is going to surprise you.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I also called Detective Flores (ph) again. We spoke at length last week. He`s LDS, a nice guy. I feel like calling him every day for updates. He said he gets calls every day from friends and family. Everyone wants answers. I still don`t even know how he died. There`s a morbid curiosity that burns to know everything. And part of me that doubts I could take any more information of that nature regarding him. I know and have faith that in time, all things are revealed. And we shall know all things. Just like our heavenly father. But we all just want to know who and why. I was afraid of insulting the detective`s intelligence, but I humbly offered some ideas for getting data out of Travis` camera, which was smashed and ruined somehow. He didn`t sound hopeful about recovering anything, but time will tell. They got data off the hard drives from the World Trade Center wreckage, so who knows.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

LAVIOLETTE: I learned that Ms. Arias became suspicious. And she was confessing that she looked at his text messages. And when she looked at his text messages, she found numerous text messages that were sexual in content before they were dating and after they were dating. That, about setting up future rendezvous with other women and about previous rendezvous with other women. And that it was crushing to her. And that she -- they were planning a trip, and she didn`t want that to ruin the trip. So she didn`t bring it up right away.

In addition to that, that she, she texted one of the women that was on -- on this or in this group, and texted that person and said Jodi cuddling with Travis, something to that regard. And she said she was kind of embarrassed that she had done that, but she did that sort of spontaneously.

MARTINEZ: She told us that what, you spent, what, 40 hours talking to the defendant?

LAVIOLETTE: 44.

MARTINEZ: 44 hours. That`s the clinical interview aspect of it, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: I used that as one of the -- that is the clinical interview that I did, right.

MARTINEZ: Yes or no, that is the clinical aspect of your practice, correct?

LAVIOLETTE: It is the clinical aspect of my practice, correct.

MARTINEZ: And in this case, the 44 hours, that`s the clinical aspect of this evaluation, right?

LAVIOLETT: I`m not sure what you mean by the clinical aspect.

MARTINEZ: Well, a clinical interview -- you know what a clinical interview is, right?

LAVIOLETTE: Of course I know what a clinical interview is.

MARTINEZ: All right. Then we seem to be having problems with it. With regard to a clinical interview, ma`am, isn`t that a situation where you sit across from an individual and you talk to them about the issue that is at hand. Isn`t that true?

LAVIOLETTE: You interview them. You ask questions. You do an assessment.

MARTINEZ: So when you are interviewing, you`re not talking then, right?

LAVIOLETTE: Mr. Martinez, I think --

MARTINEZ: Yes or no. My question is are you talking, yes or no.

LAVIOLETTE: Mr. Martinez, are you angry at me?

(LAUGHTER)

MARTINEZ: Ma`am, is that relevant to you? Is that important to you?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Ladies and gentlemen, please refrain from laughing in the courtroom.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GRACE: We remember American hero, Army Staff Sergeant Kyle Warren, 28. Manchester, New Hampshire. Second tour. Bronze Star, Purple Heart, Meritorious Service Medal. Parents, Lynn and Dale. Stepparents Ed and Jill. Widow Sandra. Kyle Warren, American hero.

April is National Autism Awareness Month. Tonight, two special and talented guests. Laura, living with autism, and her 14-year-old daughter Alana (ph).

(MUSIC)

GRACE: Everyone, thank you for being with us. I`ll see you tomorrow night, 8:00 sharp Eastern. And until then, good night, friend.

END